No More Peace
by biscotti gelato
Summary: AU. Gakuen Hetalia. PruCanAme, Spamano, FrUk, slight AsaKiku, GerIta, RoChu. With the help of the Internet, anyone can get noticed. Matthew Williams is finally noticed, and can't help, but enjoy it all. Well, all until a certain Prussian and American start fighting over him. Eventual PruCan. /HIATUS/
1. eins

**No More Peace**

© happy-synthesiser

**Hetalia **© Hidekaz Himaruya

**A/N****: Originally, this started out as a AmeCan, but then I was ****like WAIT TRIANGLE. And Gilbo/Prussia infest****ed my mind. Meh**. **PruCanAme is pretty much set in stone. ****But I can't decide who ends with who. Anyway, as for other couples** **like Spamano, GerIta, SuFin, hell even ****weird pairings, I could do. Yeah. Yep. Re-edited? I guess.  
><strong>

* * *

><p>Gilbert Beilschmidt drummed his elongated fingers on the desk before him, frowning as he leaned forward. Detention was <em>sooo<em> damn boring. Even the teacher was sleeping, with a shitload of drool running out of his mouth. He glanced at the clock for nth time, before realising that looking at the time constantly didn't make it any faster. He still had thirty minutes. Deciding to doodle himself as king over an awesome kingdom, he was suddenly hit in the head by an unawesome crumpled up paper. Gilbert jumped, grabbing the wad before turning around to flip off the offending douchecanoe. He saw a grinning Antonio Fernández Carriedo (who insisted they use his middle name whenever he was mentioned), who looked as stupid as ever.

Gilbert still flipped his friend off, straightening out the crumpled yellow paper. His eyes scanned the paper with a raised eyebrow. "'Sleepover's at your place tonight, right? And why were you talking to yourself on the way to detention?'" Gilbert repeated under his breathe.

He snorted, scribbling back a reply in his messy handwriting. Gilbert roughly tossed it behind him, not caring when he had heard Antonio fall out of his seat. Wow, even Antonio hadn't realised who the awesome (marginally less than Gilbert) Matthew Williams was.

Just like this morning...

_"Gilbert, I'm not going to get detention just to keep you company," Matthew sighed in annoyance, clutching his textbooks to his thin chest, "besides, it's not like the teachers would notice it was me making trouble."_

_Yeah... that was kinda true._

_Gilbert whined incoherently, making up weird gibberish in high-pitched tones. "C'mon, Mattie, help a guy out!" His friend had suddenly froze, a blush on his face as he stared straightforward. "Yo, Mattie," Gilbert waved a hand in front of the violet-eyed boy, jumping up and down, "Matt — oh."_

_Alfred F. Jones was across the hallway, sipping on McDonald's soda, waving at a smiling Matthew with an excited grin. Ah, Alfred F. Jones, the man Matthew was unconditionally and irrevocably in love with. Oya. We're using Twilight terms.  
><em>

_Gil scowled, a Lovino-like scowl on his face. That American honestly grated on his nerves. "O-Oh, sorry, Gilbert," Matthew pushed up his glasses (adorably, Gilbert duly noted), "but we were hanging out last night."_

_"WHAT? WHAT THE HELL, MATT! THE HELL. I'M YOUR BEST FRIEND, YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO TELL ME SHIT!"_

_"Keep it down, Beilschmidt," Roderich Edelstein reprimanded the boy, the words HALL MONITOR blazened across his strikingly orange vest, "talking to yourself again..."_

_Gilbert's eye twitched. "Fuck off, Edelstein. Go play your stupid cello!" He smirked triumphantly._

_"...I play the piano, Gilbert."_

_"ERGH."_

_And then the evil he-she-bitch from his past returned, Elizabeta Héderváry. She smiled calmly to Roderich, who was still shaking his head at Gilbert. "Hello Roderich," Elizabeta greeted him warmly, before turning to face Gilbert. An ominous feeling crept up his back as she smiled that sick, demented smile (he never meant to grope her breasts when they were younger, God, no, and he prayed for hours and hours after that horrible time) when she spoke. "Good morning to you, Gilbert. Being nice to Roderich?"_

_ "Nice?" His voice cracked for a moment as he struggled to get back his composure and become his usual cool, awesome self. "I've been wayyy better than nice! I was, um, coming to tell him Guten Tag?"_

_Elizabeta nodded calmly, her hand inching into her messenger bag slowly. Gilbert could see the handle of something, something very similar to a frying pan...? "Well, good day, Gilbert." The red eyed teen nodded frantically as he sped away, hand pulling on his metal cross West had given him.  
><em>

_"Sie ist so umheimlich, Gott rette mich..."_

_"She's so scary, God save me..."  
><em>

Gilbert was pulled out of his reverie with another paper to the head. _Who_, it read, _is Matthew Williams? Anyway, Feliciano + Lovino + tomates = world peace._

The red eyed man crumpled up the paper, tossing it to the side this time. If this conversation continued, Antonio would just write about Feliciano and Lovino obsessively. Although, the two spent most of their time at his and West's house. Especially that one time...

_Gilbert had dragged himself out of bed, shoving on some boxers with little yellow birdies. Gilbird was still napping in his little house, Gilbert noted with a yawn. He stumbled down the stairs, almost falling forward. Ah, he was never a morning person. Dammit, West hadn't even made breakfast yet. Gilbert, half-asleep, began making wurst out of habit. As he finished, he fished through the fridge for some beer. While shoving through expired food, he felt someone kick his ass.  
><em>

_"WEST," He fumed angrily, turning around with wonderful German beer in his hands, "er, wait, Feliciano?"_

_The Italian kinda looked like Feli, but this one was scowling with his arms crossed. Damnnn, Feli must _not_ be a morning person. "That's my brother, you potato-bastard! And I can smell your stinky wurst breakfast!" The brown haired boy spat out, making Gilbert glare._

_"Oi, kid, shut your —"_

_"Ve~, Lovino and Gil~," Feliciano came from the guest room upstairs, waving at the two happily, "is that wurst? Yay!"_

_Lovino continued glaring at Gilbert, who had mellowed down once he saw Feliciano. He put a finger at Gilbert's chest, eyes narrowed. "You better be nice to my fucking idiot brother, bastard." Gilbert rolled his eyes, knowing that Lovino wasn't the least bit threatening._

_He kinda wanted to punch him._

But then Gilbert realised how adorable both were, and began calling them Feli and Lovi (much to Lovino's irritation). However, he wasn't as crazy and obsessed as Antonio, who even knew that Lovino was a year older than Feliciano, but was in the same year as the latter.

Oh yeah. Totally obsessed. The last sleepover was at Toni's, and Francis had insisted on making them all crossdress. So, Gilbert had taken to hiding in Antonio's closet, where he was found several minutes later after his awesome curiosity got the better of him, and he snooped through Toni's things.

_Gilbert had found several boxes marked: 'SECRET, DO NOT OPEN UNLESS YOUR NAME IS ANTONIO FERNÁNDEZ CARRIEDO.' He'd snorted at that, opening the box without a second thought. There were CDs and photo albums abundant in the box, and he chose to look through the items. Screw Toni's privacy.  
><em>

_"'My First Proposal to Feli~,' 'The First Day I Got to Babysit Lovi,' 'The Day When Lovi was Almost Raped by that One Turkish Guy and I Saved Him,' 'The Day I Realised Lovi Looks Like a Tomate'... what the hell is wrong with Antonio," Gilbert flipped through the CDs with wide eyes, before grabbing the photo albums, "the fuck..."_

_The album was galore with photos of Feliciano and Lovino — Feliciano: one year old; Lovino: two years old, Feliciano and Lovino through the years, Lovino and Feliciano with their curls making a heart, Feliciano hugging a slightly smiling Lovino, Lovino and Feliciano sleeping, and much, much, more. Gilbert didn't even want to know what else was in the rest of the three or more albums._

Another paper to the head broke Gilbert from having anymore strange flashbacks.

"Dumm Toni," Gil grumbled under his breathe, grasping the note off the floor and reading it, _I GOTS TO KNOW WHO THIS MATTHEW IS. Tell meeeee!_

Gilbert crumpled it again, sticking the strawberry flavoured gum from his mouth unto the ball. He chucked it back, and was awarded with Antonio's screech.

"AH! ¡ESTÁ PEGADA A MI CABELLO!"

"_Ah! It's stuck in my hair!_"

The teacher had woken up at that, and glared at the brown haired Spaniard. Antonio was pulling on the pink gum, trying to pull it off his head as tears gathered in his green eyes. "Mr. Carriedo," the teacher scowled in irritation, "another week of detention. And, is that gum I see? I guess that I'll have to give you gum-scraping duty."

Antonio whimpered pitifully, wishing he was cuddling with a certain bitchy Italian and tomatoes.

* * *

><p>"Ah, mon ami, it's not so bad!"<p>

Francis had styled Antonio's hair differently, trying to hide the bald spot that was pretty obvious. The Spaniard was sniffling, holding unto his stuffed toy, which was a bull. His hair. Gah, Gilbert needed to make this all up.

The Prussian teen stalked into the room, tossing a bag to the sulking brunette. Antonio reached into the bag, pulling out a small box, the kind used for rings. His green eyes widened as he inspected the exterior curiously.

"...Gil, I'm sorry, but I don't feel the same —"

"Just open the damn thing."

Antonio flipped open the box, which revealed an oval shaped locket. It was open, and it had a Feliciano in one side, and Lovino on the other. Both of them were smiling, surprisingly. "SO ADORABLE."

As Antonio fawned over the necklace, Francis beckoned Gilbert closer. The red eyed man obliged immediately, holding his laptop in one hand. "So, I hear you've made a Facebook for Matthieu," Francis commented, "what is your plan?"

"I want Mattie to be noticed more. He's always so sad when people ignore him," Gilbert replied bluntly, eyes scanning his computer screen, "and it's up to the awesome me to do so."

Francis' eyes glittered. "Are you sure that it's not much more than that, _mon chéri_?"

Gilbert paused, gently setting Gilbird down on his desk to face Francis. "What do you mean by that? And for the last fucking time, I _don't_ speak French, Francis." He turned back to his awesome laptop, which had awesome stickers with yellow birdies and the Canadian and Prussian flag. Because all three of those things were honestly awesome.

* * *

><p><strong>Gilbert Beilschmidt<strong> is now friends with **Matthew Williams**.

**Alfred F. Jones** heyyy, Mattie's my friend too

**Arthur Kirkland** ...I'm cousins with Matthew.

**Gilbert Beilschmidt** WHATT

**Alfred F. Jones** EWWW HE'S GOT UR BLOOD IN HIM  
>[<strong>Gilbert Beilschmidt<strong>,** Alfred F. Jones**, _and_ **Francis Bonnefoy** _like this_]

**Francis Bonnefoy** I knew he was related to lovely Artie.

**Gilbert Beilschmidt** DAMMIT FRANCIS I'M RIGHT NEXT TO YOU TELL ME SHIT  
>[<strong>Gilbert Beilschmidt<strong> _and_ **Francis Bonnefoy** _like this_]

**Arthur Kirkland** to **Alfred F. Jones** I find that highly offensive, twat. And don't call me lovely, Frog.

**Alfred F. Jones** how unrefined for a gentleman

**Arthur Kirkland** I'm surprised you even know how to spell unrefined and what it means.  
>[<strong>Antonio Fernández Carriedo<strong>, **Gilbert Beilschmidt**, _and_ **Francis Bonnefoy** _like this_]

**Alfred F. Jones** I see how it is

**Antonio Fernández Carriedo** to **Gilbert Beilschmidt**, **Alfred F. Jones**, **Arthur Kirkland**, **Francis Bonnefoy**, **Lovino Vargas**, **Feliciano Vargas**, **Lars Hendriks**, **Ludwig Beilschmidt**, who is this **Matthew Williams**!

**Matthew Williams** I AM Matthew Williams. Why did you even send me a friend request if you didn't even know who I was?

**Lovino Vargas** DAMN YOU TOMATO JERK DAMN YOU POTATO BASTARDS DAMN YOU FRENCHIE PERVERT DAMN YOU FLUFFY EYEBROWS DAMN YOU COKE SMOKING EDWARD CULLEN

to **Matthew Williams** you didn't say you were making an account

[**Feliciano Vargas**, **Antonio Fernández Carriedo**, _and_ **Lovino Vargas** _like this_]

**Lars Hendriks** I don't smoke coke, i smoke marijuana and i look nothing like edward cullen...ok maybe the hair  
>[<strong>Antonio Fernández Carriedo<strong>,** Gilbert Beilschmidt**, _and_ **Alfred F. Jones** _like this_]

**Matthew Williams** Can we please stop talking about drugs?

**Arthur Kirkland** Seconded.

**Alfred F. Jones** Mattie's dis relly awesome guy w/ violet eyes n a big curl n he wears glasses n hes relly quiet

**Gilbert Beilschmidt** i was bout to say that!

**Alfred F. Jones** too late ROFLMAO

**Feliciano Vargas** FRATELLO, TE PASTA'S READY  
>[<strong>Ludwig Beilschmidt<strong>, **Gilbert Beilschmidt**, _and_ **three** _others like this_]

**Alfred F. Jones** damn im hungry  
>[<strong>Matthew Williams<strong>, **Feliciano Vargas**, **Lovino Vargas**, _and_ **Lars Hendriks** _like this_]

**Antonio Fernández Carriedo** How come I wasnt invited to this dinner of yours

**Lovino Vargas** DAMN SHUT UP I WANNA EAT IN PEACE DAMN 1;'.doaodjf **Feliciano** quit bothering me, I'm trying to curse AND DONT LIKE MY BROTHERS POST POTATO BASTARDOS

**Feliciano Vargas** Fratello, calm down! Ti amo!  
>[<strong>Francis Bonnefoy<strong> _likes this_]

**Lovino Vargas** Feli it's ti voglio bene!

**Feliciano Vargas** eh? oh ti voglio bene

**Francis Bonnefoy** Ohonhonhon~.

**Gilbert Beilschmidt** We need to end this thing i wanna watch horror movies

**Antonio Fernández Carriedo** How come I wasnt invited to watch movies

**Gilbert Beilschmidt** ...Toni this is our sleepover night. You even picked the movie!

**Francis Bonnefoy** Mon chéri Gilbert is correct.

**Arthur Kirkland** Smart, Carriedo.

**Antonio Fernández Carriedo** i dun care what u think kirkland go back to britishland  
>[<strong>Alfred F. Jones<strong> _likes this_]

**Matthew Williams** ...I'm going to delete my Facebook.

* * *

><p>Matthew sighed loudly, eying through the long chat. He'd smiled however, when he'd read the comments Gilbert and Alfred had written. It was true, he and Arthur were cousins, but Matthew was also distantly related to Francis. His mother had explained it to him, Arthur's mother was his father's sister, and his mother's third cousin or whatever was Francis' father.<p>

Confusing.

Biting his lip, he hovered over the link to Alfred F. Jones' profile on the computer. He hesitated, wondering if it said that he was single or in a relationship. Matthew clicked on it, and his heart froze. Alfred F. Jones is in a relationship with... with...

Alfred F. Jones.

Matt blinked, confused as he read those words. There definitely was a picture of Alfred there, which meant the American had made another account. He chuckled under his breathe, arms tightly wound around Kumajirou. He could kind of thank Gilbert for setting this all up.

And so, the young protagonist of the story went to sleep with a smile on his face.

* * *

><p><strong>AN: I'm not quite sure if the translations are correct or not, so feel free to tell me differently. I'm kinda leaning toward PruCan... hm.  
><strong>


	2. deux

_No More Peace_

© happy-synthesiser

_Hetalia_ © Hidekaz Himaruya

**A/N: Ah, I feel the love. Butttt, _reviews_ are the best love, and motivate me.** **Really.** **Anyway, please suggest _pairings_** **for me to do. 'Cause I gots no idea what to do, honestly. Hm, I love Kumajirou. :D Also, I put in some more characters, yeah~. Re-edited. I really suck at onomatopoeia.  
><strong>

**Oh, and I forgot about the Anon.**

**to Anon - Thank you~.  
><strong>

* * *

><p>"G-Gilbert, <em>mon ami<em>, your grip is a little too tight..."

Francis winced at the tight hold the Prussian had on him, while the television still continued to blare out the girl's screams. Gilbert blinked, laughing nervously as he unclenched from the sighing Frenchman. "Haha! I was just trying to, um," He faltered for a moment, "check your pulse, like the awesome friend I am!" Francis raised an eyebrow in amusement, choosing not to say the truth.

Before Gilbert could throw another excuse, Antonio screeched and buried his head into Gilbert's shoulder. He didn't care if the shirt smelled, he didn't want to see the boy get decapitated. Sure, he liked red because of tomatoes and his homeland's flag, but dammit, this was too scary. _Think of Lovi and Feli_, he chanted as he tried to drown out the noises, _and, and happiness! And the fact Spain is kicking ass in Euro 2012!  
><em>

Even Gilbert was in shock and fear at the movie. He held unto the Antonio this time, both trembling as they watched the bloody scenes. It was a wonder why Francis wasn't bothered. Maybe it was because he'd already watched the movie with some girl he picked up — Evangelina, was it? — and spent the entire time just making out. Yeah, this movie only made him horny.

Creepy, right.

"GAHHH!" Gilbert screamed uncontrollably, pausing the television with shaky arms. While Antonio curled up on the couch and murmured about how Lovi and Feli were adorable, Francis could only giggle. "Why are you the only one not freaking out?"

The Frenchman shrugged.

"Toni, please stop rocking back and forth, you might just pee all over the couch..." Gilbert told him with an uneasy grin, shoving in another new movie. "See, look at this..."

And Antonio was immediately entranced by "Attack of the Killer Tomatoes".*

"Really, Gilbert." Francis deadpanned, eying the television with slight interest.

"I still don't see how you couldn't be scared of that _verdammt, ekelhaft Film_..."

"_...damn, disgusting film..._"

Francis didn't really know the German words spouting from his friend's mouth, but recognised film. "I don't know, but it made me... _excité_," He finished with a pervy grin.

_Excited_.

"How the hell —"

Suddenly, there was ominous creaking. The three froze as it stopped, and huddled together.

"Probably was, um, rats?"

"I don't have rats in my house. That would be unawesome."

"We should get some beer, wine, and tomatoes, oui?"

And so, the Trio practically stumbled down the stairs to get to the kitchen. Racing to the kitchen, they checked the fridge before gasping. No, no, no — "Hey, tomatoes!" Antonio grinned cheerfully, taking out the food and biting into it immediately. Too bad for the other two...

"No wine," moaned Francis.

"No beer," whined Gilbert.

The Prussian took notice of a note tacked to the fridge in Ludwig's neat handwriting. _If you haven't forgotten, I'm at Feliciano's. Also, Großvater told me to take away your alcohol. Especially since you burnt down part of the house last time... Take care of yourself, Bruder. And tell that Francis to stop snooping through my things and leaving BDSM items in my room. And porn.  
><em>

Oh. Ohhh, yeah. Ludwig's face got all red when he saw those items in his room, and he'd gone all badass and scared the shit out of Francis (even though Gilbert knew that Ludwig had porn stashed in a safe under his bed and locked on his computer). So then the French teen had grown a sudden fear for the German... But yeah, months back, probably half a year, Toni had accidentally burnt down part of the house cooking tomatoes. Gilbert had paid everything off until only recently. He hated doing jobs, but he had to repay his _Großvater_...

Eh. He'd just buy beer — oh wait, there was a PS at the end.

_Also, Großvater says, and this is a direct quote: "If you buy alcohol, I'm kicking your ass out and selling your things to perverts. Like Francis. Maybe even Roma..."  
><em>

Gilbert groaned, knowing how his old man had the gift of smell and knew immediately if his darling grandchildren were drunk — and if that wasn't enough, the hangover would prove everything they did.

"Knock, knock, knock."

The front door was knocked on loudly, and all three men jumped fearfully. Who would be ringing right now? A serial killer — no, _don't think that_! "I say you go, Francis," Antonio and Gilbert prodded the Frenchman, who looked at them frantically.

"_QUOI_? Why me?"

"Because it might make you horny again!" Gilbert hissed at him quietly, shoving Francis toward the front door.

The suave teen sighed out, taking a deep breathe a moment after. He could do this, he could — "I can't do it!" Francis crumpled to the floor, looking desperately at a facepalming Gilbert and a trembling Antonio.

"Fine! Not it!"

"Not it!"

"Not it — aww..."

"Ha! You get to do the unawesome job, Toni!"

The Spaniard gulped, setting a determined look on his tanned face. Putting a hand on the doorknob, he unlocked the door. Twisting it, the door finally revealed the serial killer — er, not harmful person on the other side.

"I'm hungry."

"K-Kumajirou!" Gilbert gaped at the sight of the polar bear, who casually walked in. Antonio closed the door immediately, locking it as he let out a relieved sigh. "Where's Mattie?"

"Who?"

Gilbert groaned at the bear's cluelessness as Antonio pet Kuma's head gently. It was adorable, with its fluffiness and everything... "The man who feeds you, Kumajirou." Gilbert tried again, sitting on the floor and levelling with the forgetful animal.

"The one with the...glasses and curl?" Kumajirou asked after a long moment, nibbling on a tomato Antonio had given him. "Oh. He said something about Alfred. And then I got hungry so I left. I thought his name was Marik. Or Marvin. But Marik sounds right..."

The Prussian was at a loss for words before swooping up the bear and rushing away. His two other friends blinked in surprise.

"Well, let's go and eat all his ice cream. So he won't get fat?" Antonio suggested happily, humming Spanish lullabies.

Francis smiled in agreement.

* * *

><p>Matthew had thought it would be a peaceful night until someone started ringing on his doorbell. So, the Canadian armed himself in his trusty hockey gear and his beautiful hockey stick. Also, Kumajirou could kick ass.<p>

He opened the door, hockey stick in his hands at the ready. Instead of being greeted with a creeper, he was greeted with an Alfred F. Jones.

The blonde smiled at him happily, making Matthew feel like a complete idiot in his hockey gear. _Wow, this will totally win your crush over..._ He thought bitterly, while pulling off his helmet combo and neck guard. "U - Um, Alfred, what are you doing here?" Not that he minded all that much, but the clocks did blare the words eleven thirteen. "Not that I don't mind..."

"Oh, I just came by to see if you wanted to hang out, y'know?" The American grinned broadly, holding a hand out to the other blonde. Matthew blinked at the hand, taking it hesitantly. "So, let's go for a walk?"

"O-Okay!" Matthew was flustered right away, grasping Kumajirou and whispering to him, "Kuma, I'm gonna go hang out with Alfred, okay?"

The bear blinked. Matthew took that as a yes. Locking the door, he left the bear alone.

* * *

><p>"That's some nice hockey gear," Alfred commented lightly, shoving his hands into his brown jacket as they stopped walking, "but I guess it's only right for the captain of the hockey team."<p>

Matthew tinged pink, sitting down beside the American on the bench. He twiddled with his thumbs, wondering why the hell he was acting like a girl. Not that he hadn't noticed his own slight femininity. "You know I'm on the hockey team?"

"Yep! I know that Antonio Fernández Carriedo is the captain of the soccer (or otherwise known as football, _whateverrrr_) team! But the rest, I forgot. But I'm the coolest leader of the American football! Do you come to my games?"

It was a wonder how Alfred could be so energetic so late at night. However, Matthew was a little disappointed that he hadn't mentioned that because he only noticed Matthew. "Occasionally," Matthew lied from behind his teeth, because he'd been to every single damn game, "it's so loud..."

"I know, but it's so cool, though! And the lights are so brighttt."

And thus ended their conversation, making that awkward five minute silence so many people have.

"So, Alfred —"

"I've always noticed you."

Alfred blurted out, wringing his hands nervously. Matthew blushed at the words, tucking a wavy piece of hair behind his ear. "Ugh, this makes me sound like an old pervert," Alfred whined loudly, before gazing into Matthew's violet eyes, "but, honestly, I have. You caught my attention the moment I saw you in the beginning of our first year.

"The teacher was calling out names, and when she got to Matthew Williams, she thought he was some bad kid that ditched school. Then I saw you wave your hand to try and get her attention, and she completely ignored you. But I couldn't, and now I sound like some girly, pathetic, gay teenager — wait, I _am_ gay, and now I'm freaking out and need some soda and fries and burgers and —"

"Alfred..."

"I'm sorry, I forced myself on you! This is so unheroic, I should just go."

"Alfred."

"Really, Mattie, I didn't even have the courage to talk to you 'till now —"

Alfred stopped his babbling as Matthew's lips touched his.

* * *

><p><strong>Antonio Fernández Carriedo<strong> likes "Attack of the Tomatoes" and "Return of the Tomatoes"  
>[<strong>Antonio Fernández Carriedo<strong> _and_ **Emma Hendriks** _like this_]

**Emma Hendriks**** Obviously, Toni. :D

**Lovino Vargas** stupid tomato bastardo

**Antonio Fernández Carriedo** ah! Emma and Lovi~

**Ivan Braginski** I've never heard of that film before.

**Antonio Fernández Carriedo** ohhohh Ivan...

**Ivan Braginski** Perhaps **Yao Wang** and I could watch it together, Да?

**Arthur Kirkland** How did you even get Cyrillic?

**Ivan Braginski** (´ε｀ )~  
>[<strong>Kiku Honda<strong> _likes this_]

**Yao Wang** what is that about me watching a movie with you? Besides, **Kiku Honda** and I have already watched it, right, Kiku?

**Kiku Honda** I have no idea what you're talking about, Yao-san. However, it's not like I am doing this out of spite due to the fact that you left me all alone to lift your boxes of china which gave me back pains. Not at all. Ivan-san, you should watch it with Yao-san.  
>[<strong>Ivan Braginski<strong> _and_ **Feliciano Vargas** _like this_]

**Yao Wang** AIYAH!

**Arthur Kirkland** Yes, Wang might enjoy watching it with Braginski. I completely agree with you, Kiku.  
>[<strong>Ivan Braginski<strong> _likes this_]

**Yao Wang** shut it, Opium!  
>[<strong>Antonio Fernández Carriedo<strong> _likes this_]

**Arthur Kirkland** Please do not blame me for my homeland's actions.

**Francis Bonnefoy** Indeed, Yao. Please don't be so rough with Arthur, because that's my job.  
>[<strong>Francis Bonnefoy<strong> _and_ **Elizabeta Héderváry** _like this_]

**Arthur Kirkland** ...I feel oddly violated.  
>[<strong>Francis Bonnefoy<strong> _and_ **Ivan Braginski** _like this_]

**Sadık Adnan** Doesn't everyone feel that way when dealing with Francis?  
>[<strong>Arthur Kirkland<strong>, **Ivan Braginski**, **Lovino Vargas**, _and_ **four** _others like this_]

**Heracles Karpusi** isn't it different with you because you actually like it?  
>[<strong>Feliciano Vargas<strong> _and_ **Antonio Fernández Carriedo** _like this_]

**Sadık Adnan** Why you...

**Feliciano Vargas** Where's Gil and Matt and Alfred ve?

**Arthur Kirkland** You're right, Vargas. Jones and Beilschmidt are always blaring their loud mouths online... I wonder where they are. Alfred didn't mention anything about going anywhere tonight.

**Francis Bonnefoy** I have an idea~. Honhonhon~. Would you like to know about my guess? ***  
>[<strong>Elizabeta Héderváry<strong> _likes this_]

**Arthur Kirkland** No.

**Ivan Braginski** Please don't speak more, Да?

**Kiku Honda** Francis-san, just... no.

**Antonio Fernández Carriedo** For the love of tomatoes, don't. you're already talking about it to me, don't taint Feli and Lovi

**Lovino Vargas** Keep your fucking mouth shut! And don't try to cover for me tomato jerk!

**Feliciano Vargas** Ah fratello knows best! I don't want to know, other Big Brother Francis.

**Yao Wang** stop speaking.

**Sadık Adnan** That violating feeling comes back so, uh, no  
>[<strong>Arthur Kirkland<strong>, **Lovino Vargas**, **Ivan Braginski**, _and_ **five** _others like this_]

**Heracles Karpusi** I actually agree with that old man above me

**Elizabeta Héderváry** Ignore them, Francis, please describe it in detail, so I can write it down and post it on my blog!  
>[<strong>Elizabeta Héderváry<strong> _and_ **Francis Bonnefoy** _like this_]

**Francis Bonnefoy** Ah, Elizabeta ma chéri, I shall!

**Ludwig Beilschmidt** Bonnefoy, you type one more letter, and I will go after you. I know Bruder won't hold me back, and you better quit putting those "things" in my rooms.  
>[<strong>Feliciano Vargas<strong>, **Lovino Vargas**, **Kiku Honda**, _and_ **seven** _others like this_]

**Francis Bonnefoy** ah...Ludwig, don't worry! I won't do anything! (Ｔ＿Ｔ)

**Feliciano Vargas** Thank you, Luddy!

**Lovino Vargas** Well the first time the potato bastardo was useful. And don't call him Luddy, stupido piccolo fratello!

**Feliciano Vargas** I'm sorry fratello!

**Lovino Vargas** ...Fine whatever. Just get me a tomato. And...I'm sorry too.

**Feliciano Vargas** okay fratello! d(^_^o)

**Antonio Fernández Carriedo** How about one for big brother too?

**Arthur Kirkland** Can we please get back on the topic of Alfred, Matthew, and Gilbert? Where in the world are they?

**Antonio Fernández Carriedo** well, Gilbert took that cute little bear back to matthew or something. I forget

**Arthur Kirkland** Hm... I guess I'll go call the fat git.  
>[<strong>Feliciano Vargas<strong>, **Lovino Vargas**, _and_ **Ivan Braginski** _like this_]

* * *

><p>"Dammit, Kuma, you should have come to me sooner..."<p>

Gilbert clutched the polar/whatever-the-hell-species-it-was bear. The bear shrugged, sipping on the milkshake Gilbert had bought it. Kumajirou had been adamant in getting some food other than the tomato, and he had even flung the red object at Gilbert.

He shrugged again. "Sorry," Kumajirou apologised blandly, not really giving a damn. Because he was a bear, and he simply didn't care much about anything, "Canada. Matthew."

"Wow, you got his name right... Hm, doesn't look like Mattie's home yet..." Gilbert rung the doorbell several more times before debating whether to chuck a rock at the window. Nah, Matthew would kill him then. And he'd probably have to pay for it. "Where could he be?"

The Prussian walked down the street, his arms still clutched around Kumajirou. Another obvious place was their playground, but it slightly hurt when he thought about it. He and Mattie had so many memories there...

_"Hey, that was my seat on the swing!"_

_Seven year old Gilbert glared at the violet eyed boy, who had his arms crossed. There was a pout on his lips as Gilbert continued that narrowed gaze. "..._ Fuck off,_ brat." His accent was still there a bit, and he wasn't in the mood to deal with some annoying kid. Ludwig was still better than him, winning those pathetisch und unsinnig awards****. Ludwig was becoming...daresay, more awesome than him?  
><em>

_"Wh - What?"_

_Those beautiful violet eyes brimmed with sparkly tears, making Gilbert immediately feel bad. The kid still kept sobbing, before Gilbert pulled the kid into a hug. The blonde sniffled quietly, reciprocating hesitantly. "You stop crying?" Gilbert grumbled out, wiping off the tears coming from the hiccuping boy's cheeks._

_He nodded, a light blush on his cheeks. "I - I'm Matthew Williams," The boy introduced himself, "and you're Gilbert Beilschmidt. I've seen you around school. You're always getting into trouble."_

_"It's not my fault that the teachers can't recognise me and my...um..."_

_"Awesomeness?"_

_"Yeah! Ludwig used to call me an awesome older brother, but he changed..."_

_"Ludwig?"_

_Gilbert scrunched up his nose, kicking the other kid out of the swing nearby so he and Matt could swing together. "He's my little brother. He's really smart and stuff, and he always gets attention." His mood darkened again._

_"Hm," Matthew hummed, swinging back and forth on the swing gently, before stopping, "Gilbert."_

_"Yeah?"_

_"I'm sure that you have your own great qualities that outshine your brother."_

_Matthew sent him a dazzling, pearly white smile the six year old***** could manage. Seven year old Gilbert could only become flustered.  
><em>

Gilbert walked over to the park hurriedly, spotting Matthew and Alfred at the swings.

"...couldn't, and now I sound like some girly, pathetic, gay teenager — wait, I am gay, and now I'm freaking out and need some soda and fries and burgers and —"

The American was spazzing out, Gilbert noted.

"Alfred..."

Matthew was smiling slightly...

"I'm sorry, I forced myself on you! This is so unheroic, I should just go."

Alfred grasped his glasses from his pockets.

"Alfred."

Matthew stood up.

"Really, Mattie, I didn't even have the courage to talk to you 'till now —"

And Gilbert's mind stopped working and heart hurt as he saw Matthew's lips touch Alfred's.

* * *

><p><strong>So, um, yeah..<strong>

*** = "Attack of the Killer Tomatoes" is quite the film...  
>** = Emma Hendriks is my name for Belgium.<br>*** = Well, Francis was, erm, thinking about, well, um, a three-cough-cough-some.  
>**** = translation: pathetic and nonsensical<br>***** = If I'm not mistaken, Canada's birthday is July 1, while Prussia's is January 18. So the memory is between those two months.  
><strong>

**Well, I'm happy I added more characters, especially Ivan/Russia. Guten Tag, ja?  
><strong>


	3. 三

_No More Peace_

© happy-synthesiser

_Hetalia_

© Hidekaz Himaruya

* * *

><p><strong>chapter 三<strong>

* * *

><p>"JONES! LET ME OUT!"<p>

"NEVER — 'sup, Kooks!"

Alfred waved at the Japanese teen walking down the hallway, who blinked in surprise as he saw the American teen hold the small closet completely shut. He opened his mouth to inquire politely, but brushed it off a mere second later. Alfred might drag him into another adventure which would inevitably drag them to the principal's office who would drag them into their own graves through expulsion and literally into a grave where he would die of shame.

Not a pretty picture.

Kiku Honda reminisced duly, something he had gone through before. Alfred, a year back, had insisted that the school was supposedly haunted. So, he'd forced Kiku Honda to join him at school, during the weekend, and survey the school. As expected, Alfred had broken a few windows, and crumbled a wall due to his immense strength and his fear of supposedly "scary things".

Needless to say, Alfred and Kiku Honda were suspended. However, Alfred had snorted in derision and forced Kiku Honda into shopping and promising that he'd repay Kiku Honda, but we all know that it would never happen.

"Ah... Good morning, Alfred-san," Kiku Honda said rather lamely, choosing to continue reading his manga then ask why there were loud, muffled screams of "JONES" or "BLOODY HELL, I NEED TO USE THE LOO, _YOU FUCKING BARMY WANKER_!"

No, Kiku Honda should just ignore it, but with politeness.

"Yeah, I'll see you after first period!" Alfred waved at his older friend enthusiastically with one hand, the other on the doorknob. "Have fun!"

However, Kiku Honda briefly wondered why, exactly, his seat partner, Arthur Kirkland, was stuck in a blooming broom closet.

Well, we should get to the beginning, jа?

Alfred F. Jones practically shined.

It was like rays of sun were emanating from the exuberant teen as he hummed a song, one of his many favourites. Which happened to be the American anthem, "The Star-Spangled Banner". It was a great — no, fantastic day, filled with chirping birds and smiling, kind passerbys as Alfred F. Jones energetically bounced to school. Well, 'till some limey Brit appeared and ruined all his happiness.

"Jones!"

"O'er the land of the _freeee_, and the home of the _braveeee_!" Alfred sang out horribly, plugging his ears in an attempt to annoy the already annoyed Arthur Kirkland. "Yeah! America FTW!" He fist-pumped.

Arthur's green eye twitched uncontrollably. "Stop your beastly screeching."

"You're just jealous 'cause your British anthem sucks!" Alfred stuck his tongue out at the teen, who could only glare as his bushy eyebrows pulled down in the middle. "What was it called again?"

Arthur flushed in embarrassment, even more aggravated by Alfred's comment. He grumbled under his breathe, refraining from killing — choking — smothering — drowning — poisoning — the blunt American (those ideas seemed so appealing in his mind). "'God Save the Queen' is a bloody well anthem, and you know it." He tried to calm himself down, because he should already be used to Alfred's constant annoyingness...ish.

"Yeah, totally cool, broski," Alfred murmured boredly, already having dropped the subject, "anyway, did you notice my obvious shining?"

Arthur gave him a once over again, seeing the beam the American held, and the strange bounce in his step. There could only be one thing that could make Alfred F. Jones this happy. "Now that I think about it, it's blatantly obvious. Did they supersize those revolting burgers of yours? I swear to God, you're going to die from a heart attack one day, Alfred." Well, it totally wasn't Arthur's fault, even though he babysat Alfred for years when they were younger and fed him damn tasty (horrible) food. He was only a year older than Alfred, however.

"What? And hamburgers are the world," Alfred's eyes shone once again as he mentioned his favourite dish, "but no. Guess! Guess!"

The Englishman rolled his eyes at Alfred's antics, taking a moment to think before sighing. "You've lost weight?" Arthur asked uncaringly, not really thinking about his fellow friend.

"So you _do_ think I'm fat!" Alfred accused him immediately, an offended look on his features as he pulled on his stomach, even lifting his shirt. "I knew it, I knew it —"

"Jones, shut it. And _please_, put down your shirt!"

"Look! The flab! It's disgusting, isn't it!"

"Alfred, please."

"I need to order more protein shakes from America, don't I? Do I need to go on a fish diet? I should get sushi from Kiku, then! I need to go on some freaky Asian diet, don't I?"

Arthur rubbed his temple tenderly, since he was slowly forming a headache. And the day had hardly begun. Alfred was really the champion of being aggravating and irritating and all other adjectives for annoying, indeed. "Alfred, please belt up, and tell me what you've been so ruddy ecstatic about." Arthur interrupted the boy's whining, checking the time on his pocket watch. Ten more minutes 'till they reached school... And Alfred would be away from him.

Glorious.

"Well, uh..."

"Spit it out, or I'll give you my scones."

"I made out with Mattie on Friday!"

The American smiled happily. The Brit froze right away.

"**My** baby cousin, Matthew Williams?"

"Yep!"

"_Are you taking the piss_?"

"The what? But Matt's lips were soft —"

"_I'LL KILL YOU, YOU WANKER_."

And this was how the sucky chef Arthur Kirkland was held prisoner in a closet by the amazing Alfred F. Jones.

"Look, Artie, the more you struggle, the more I won't let you leave~!"

The Brit was kneeling in front of the door, hand on the knob as he sighed. "You sound like that perverted Frog," He murmured out, running a hand through his blonde locks. "And now I'm missing first period," Arthur gazed at his pocket watch, which damned him. Why couldn't he freeze time? Or beat the shite out of Alfred for touching Matthew?

The doorknob jiggled, allowing Alfred to go inside and lock the door. Arthur stood up immediately, glaring at the American rather angrily. "You molested Matthew, and then you lock me in a closet!"

"Hey! We didn't really make out, it was a kiss, but it was awesome!" Alfred stuck his tongue out at Arthur, who looked disgusted. "And I didn't even get to say hello to him today, 'cause of you! I bet you're just jealous, since you want me all to yourself!"

Arthur became flustered immediately, reminded of that one time when they had their first kiss when they were seven. And only because Alfred had insisted that he wanted to see how it felt. "Whatever, Alfred," He sighed, "I'll have to speak to Matthew about these troubling matters..."

"Wait, whaddya mean by 'troubling'?"

* * *

><p>"Gilbert!"<p>

The Prussian speed-walked even faster, a piece of wurst clenched in his open mouth. He'd been sulking for the past two days, and dammit, he'd sulk even more! He deserved to sulk to his heart's desire! So it was his right to ignore Matthew and his awesome and pretty violet eyes, and his lovely blonde hair with that adorable curl, and his soft, sweet voice, and the way he'd smile at Gilbert in the morning as he gave the albino those lovely pancakes —

Dammit, Gilbert.

Gilbert didn't want the Canadian to be with the American because Gilbert wanted him to be with someone like Gilbert.

Er, what?

Himself?

_Ohhhhhhh, shit, I did not just think that... _Gilbert shook his head wildly, red eyes wide with surprise. Nooo, noo, no, he only thought of Mattie as a best friend, a little brother. This was totally wrong. But he didn't feel about Ludwig that way. He sure as hell didn't call Ludwig adorable. Okay, maybe when they were younger, but...

"Gilbert!" Matthew's voice interrupted him, his warm hand gripping Gilbert's forearm tightly. "Stay still this time! I just want to tell you what happened over the weekend, eh!"

Gilbert thought hurriedly, eyes darting anywhere other than Matthew's cute, reddened face from running. Ideas flew through his mind, before one seemed to click and make sense. "Look, it's Alfred with pancakes!" He shouted out in false surprise, a look of pretend shock on his pale face.

"Huh?" Matthew's grip had loosened completely, and Gilbert took the chance to run away hurriedly. Ha, he did track before, and he was damn well at it. Matthew didn't really stand that much of a chance against a determined Gilbert in running, even though Matt was pretty great at running. Gilbert heard Matthew's exasperated yells as the long chase began once again. _What fun_, he thought sarcastically, running a hand through his light-coloured hair, _I always wanted to run from a blonde kid who likes a guy who looks like him. Are Mattie and Jones narcissists?_

* * *

><p>Now, I'm sure you're all wondering what in the hell happened. And sighing at how in denial Gilbo is.<p>

Let's travel back in time~.

* * *

><p>Kumajirou hopped out of Gilbert's arms, not even noticing that the latter was still gaping in shock. Gilbert's chest ached painfully, seeing Mattie and Alfred kiss like that. It...just didn't look right. Seeing them together made him hurt all over. The pain was centred mainly in his chest, which confused him. It wasn't a heart attack, was it? Gilbert's emotions were displaced; he felt jealousy and sadness on the rise. But Mattie was free to see whomever he liked, but Gilbert never wanted to see his Birdie in the arms of someone else. He was so used to being with Mattie, taking care of him, comforting him with his awesomeness.<p>

As Matthew was held in Alfred's arms, Gilbert was sniffling. Deciding that he should just leave without them noticing, the albino trudged off. What would happen now? Would Mattie leave him all alone? Who would cook him pancakes? Where would Mattie be to scold him, or kiss the top of his head with an embarrassed face when he needed someone?

"The hell," Gilbert groaned as he rubbed his eyes, "why am I almost crying? Maybe I'm allergic to something?" He walked home in the dark rather lazily, pulling on his sleeves as he tried to stop his runny nose and very moist eyes.

"Dammit..." Gilbert started crying eventually, tears streaming down his face uncontrollably, like rain, "I — I'm too awesome to cry..."

But the tears wouldn't stop, no matter what. It just, _just fucking hurt_. Felt like Mattie had _betrayed_ him and fucking _ripped_ his heart out. Gilbert had no idea why, though. He'd experienced pain; when he fell out of that tree and broke his legs, the time he spilled boiling water all over his hands, or the other time when he had gotten mugged, which resulted in him getting stabbed and a trip to the hospital. This pain was different. On a mental and emotional level rather than physical. Although Gilbert had learnt that climbing trees without someone to help was bad, that he shouldn't play with water in cooking pots, and that he'd learnt how to kick anyone's ass (probably excluding _that_ _Russian_), he couldn't have possibly gained _anything_ the least bit helpful from his current pain.

"Maybe if I ice my chest, it'll go away. Damn, why does it feel so _damn horrible_..."

But the more and more he thought of Matthew, the more he wanted to just crawl into a hole and stay hidden from the world. Gilbert fell to his knees, still sobbing out. He didn't know how long he was there until two hands pulled him up. He just couldn't stop the way he was feeling, the _pain_, the _betrayal_, the _jealousy_, the _sadness_, and those new, strange emotions enveloping inside him without control.

"Gilbert..." Antonio's voice broke through the quiet night, murmuring quietly, as Francis gently patted the Prussian. "What happened?"

The Frenchman frowned at his friend's sudden distressed state. Sure, he'd joked around about what'd happened with Gilbert, Matthieu, and Alfred, but he was certain what had happened now. He never quite respected love that much, because love changed a person and their life, made a person different. Francis had thought of love as a completely good thing until he realised the affect it had on people. It still was a good thing, but was also harmful in different ways. Love could be a curse or a blessing.

"N — Nothing happened!" Gilbert laughed half-heartedly, pulling his arm back from a concerned Antonio and a frowning Francis. He still hurt inside. "I really don't know what happened..."

He smiled weakly, rubbing his eyes. "I guess my Awesomeness just faltered."

"Of course."

* * *

><p>Gilbert sighed as he ran a hand through his hair, reaching school much earlier than he had anticipated. He didn't have to worry about Matthew now, since they only had about one class together. He also had detention — one after school — and he could avoid Matt during lunch. Perfect plan, there were no loopholes or anything to make him change his mind. Even if he were offered a thousand dollars, he wouldn't talk to Matthew. So this plan had to work.<p>

He was awesome, he could do it.

Nah, he knew he could do it.

"Now, what to do..."

"Ve~, Ludwig, it's Gilbert..."

Feliciano Vargas jerked a thumb at Ludwig's older brother, who was staring back rather pointedly. Lovino Vargas scoffed and waited for his little brother ("...and the potato bastard..." he grumbled out.). Ludwig Beilschmidt raised an eyebrow in surprise, not used to seeing his Bruder so on time to anything much. Especially school. It wasn't like him, but what his brother was doing wasn't like Gilbert at all.

_Eins_, Gilbert was doing all the chores without Ludwig telling him to. _Zwei_, he was eating all the ice cream and sweets, even going as far to devour all the cakes Ludwig had prepared for the Vargas brothers. Drei, he was singing along to sad love songs, which irritated the German.

Needless to say, it was honestly surprising/scaring Ludwig, and he was wondering whether to phone their _Großvater_ who was still having a trip abroad with Feliciano's grandfather that would end soon. He'd tried getting information from Francis — who sighed and said that the Gilbert only knew what was happening, very maturely — and Antonio — who shrugged and asked for Lovino. So, all in all, no help. But Ludwig needed to know, since Gilbert was his only _Bruder_, and he... cared about Gilbert.

"_Bruder_," Ludwig called out to his brother, who suddenly grinned cheerfully, "why are you here so early?"

Ludwig thought he saw a look of realisation then sadness pass on his brother's face for a fleeting moment, before the smile eroded it. "Oh, I was bored of being alone at home, so I came early," Gilbert shrugged easily, shoving his hands into his pockets. "I'm awesomely early."

"Ah."

And then the awkward silence.

"Can we just go inside?" Lovino blurted out impatiently, inspecting his outfit to see if there were any wrinkles.

Gilbert snorted at that, walking forward. "Whatever you say, _Lovi_~."

"DAMMIT, DON'T FUCKING CALL ME LOVI!"

"_Fratello_, calm down!"

"QUIT HUGGING ME, FELI! WHY DO I FUCKING PUT UP WITH YOUR SHIT?"

Not again, Ludwig briefly thought as he sighed. "Please, Lovino, calm down," He commanded the older brother, who scowled back, "my _Bruder's_ been acting weird."

"Like I don't know, dammit. Antonio keeps mentioning it to me."

Gilbert paused in his tracks, looking back and laughing that suspicious and slightly forced, awkward laugh (Yes, we all know. It's that laugh). Feli uncharacteristically frowned at the same time Lovi did, making them both seem like real twins. Ah, if only a certain Spaniard with the two last names Fernández Carriedo (Why were there two last names, again? Toni had explained it to him...) were here to see and bask in the glory. So, Gilbert being Gilbert, he took a picture of the moment.

"...Did that shitty potato bastard just take a picture of us?"

Gilbert ignored that.

_Ha_, he texted Antonio, _look what i havee~_

* * *

><p><strong>Yong Soo Im<strong> has now claimed **Kiku Honda**, **Yao Wang**, **Feliciano Vargas**, and **Tino Väinämöinen**'s breasts.  
>[<strong>Yong Soo Im<strong>, **Elizabeta Héderváry**, _and_ **Peter Kirkland** _like this_]

**Kiku Honda** What? (ﾟoﾟ;;

**Yao Wang** Yong Soo, how many times have I told you...

**Feliciano Vargas** I have breasts ve~?  
>[<strong>Antonio Fernández Carriedo<strong> _likes this_]

**Tino Väinämöinen** What is this... I don't even...  
>[<strong>Berwald Oxenstierna<strong> _likes this_]

**Yong Soo Im** All your breasts are mine forever daze! Especially Yao's! And everyone has breasts, Feli.  
>[<strong>Francis Bonnefoy<strong> _and_ **Elizabeta** **Héderváry** _like this_]

**Kiku Honda** Oh my.

**Yao Wang** I know you're hiding those giggles behind your computer screen, Kiku

**Yong Soo Im** hyung's have been always been claimed by me!  
>[<strong>Kiku Honda<strong> _likes this_]

**Lovino Vargas** you can't ever have my brother's breasts, kimchi bastard  
>[<strong>Yao Wang<strong>, **Antonio Fernández Carriedo**, _and_ **Lovino Vargas** _like this_]

**Berwald Oxenstierna** Tino's my wife.  
>[<strong>Berwald Oxenstierna<strong>, **Emil Steilsson**, **Lukas Bondevik**, _and_ **Simon Densen** _like this_]

**Tino Väinämöinen** Berwarld!  
>[<strong>Berwald Oxenstierna<strong> _likes this_]

**Simon Densen** its kinda tru, tino ur both married it says it on ur profile

**Tino Väinämöinen** Well, you're married to Emil!

**Simon Densen** touché

**Yong Soo Im** then whose breasts can I also have?

**Francis Bonnefoy** Mine?

**Yong Soo Im** Arthur Kirkland can have your breasts.  
>[<strong>Francis Bonnefoy <strong>and **Elizabeta** **Héderváry** _like this_]

**Arthur Kirkland** No, thank you.

**Francis Bonnefoy** How mean~.

**Yao Wang** my breasts belong to no one!

**Yong Soo Im** except for me  
>[<strong>Elizabeta Héderváry<strong> _and_ **Kiku Honda** _like this_]

**Kiku Honda** However, my breasts belong to no one as well, Yong Soo... （−＿−；）

**Antonio Fernández Carriedo** so does this mean Lovi's breasts are mine? :D  
>[<strong>Antonio Fernández<strong>, **Ludwig Beilschmidt**, _and_ **Feliciano Vargas** _like this_]

**Lovino Vargas** FUCK NOOOO DDDDX YOU WISH TOMATO BASTARD  
>[<strong>Lovino Vargas<strong>, **Arthur Kirkland**, _and_ **Feliciano Vargas** _like this_]

**Feliciano Vargas** ve~ so who owns whose breasts?  
>[<strong>Antonio Fernández Carriedo<strong> _and_ **Elizabeta Héderváry** _like this_]

**Francis Bonnefoy** Yong Soo claimed Yao and Kiku's breasts. Tino's breasts are Berwald's, while Feliciano breasts are yet to be claimed. And Arthur has my breasts.  
>[<strong>Elizabeta Héderváry<strong>, **Yong Soo Im**, **Francis Bonnefoy**, _and_ **two** _others like this_]

**Arthur Kirkland** No, I do not, and I never will. D:

**Feliciano Vargas** Nobody's claimed my breasts?

**Lovino Vargas** Feli, that's a good thing

**Antonio Fernández Carriedo** Or Big Brother Antonio can claim your breasts?  
>[<strong>Antonio Fernández<strong>, **Francis Bonnefoy**, _and_ **Yong Soo Im **_like this_]

**Feliciano Vargas** ah, really?

**Lovino Vargas** DAMMIT FELI DAMN YOU TOMATO BERK

**Arthur Kirkland** Berk?

**Lovino Vargas** I didn't mean your berk, it was a typo

**Arthur Kirkland** I see.

**Gilbert Beilschmidt** Ludwig could always claim your breasts Feli. And if not i can...

**Ludwig Beilschmidt** Bruder...

**Gilbert Beilschmidt** its a no? I have reign over Feli's breasts mwahahaha  
>[<strong>Yong Soo Im<strong> _and_ **Francis Bonnefoy** _like this_]

**Lovino Vargas** Fottutamente bastardi patata! Feli, non posso credere voi!  
><em>Fucking potato bastards! Feli, I can't believe you!<em>  
>[<strong>Antonio Fernández Carriedo<strong> _likes this_]

**Feliciano Vargas** Sono spiacente, grande fratello! Nessuno può avere i miei seni, poi!  
><em>I'm sorry, big brother! Nobody can have my breasts, then!<em>  
>[<strong>Antonio Fernández Carriedo<strong> _likes this_]

**Gilbert Beilschmidt** Was du Jungs reden?  
><em>What're you guys talking about?<em>

**Ludwig Beilschmidt** Verwenden Sie Bruder, Englisch.  
><em>Brother, use English.<em>

**Yong Soo Im** 동생의 가슴을 소유 하 고 있습니다!  
><em>I OWN BROTHER'S BREASTS!<br>_[**Kiku Honda** _likes this_]

**Yao Wang** 没有人拥有我的乳房 ！  
><em>NOBODY OWNS MY BREASTS!<em>

**Berwald Oxenstierna** Jag antar att jag äger Tinos bröst eftersom han är min fru...  
><em>I guess I own Tino's breasts since he's my wife...<em>  
>[<strong>Simon Densen<strong> likes this]

**Tino Väinämöinen** Miten kiusallista, mutta arvata sen oikealle...  
><em>How embarrassing, but I guess it's right...<em>  
>[<strong>Berwald Oxenstierna<strong> _likes this_]

**Simon Densen** Godt jeg ved finske og svenske!  
><em>Good thing I know Finnish and Swedish!<em>  
>[<strong>Simon Densen<strong> _likes this_]

**Francis Bonnefoy** Je dis encore Qu'arthur possède mes seins.  
><em>I still say Arthur owns my breasts.<em>  
>[<strong>Antonio Fernández Carriedo<strong>, **Gilbert Beilschmidt**, _and_ **Francis Bonnefoy** _like this_]

**Ivan Braginski** Это выглядит как весело!  
><em>This looks like fun!<em>

**Kiku Honda** 私はすべてに私達の故国の言語に戻すしていることを参照してください （；゜０゜）  
><em>I see that we're all reverting to our homeland's language.<em>

**Alfred F. Jones** Google Translate to the rescue!

**Feliciano Vargas** ve~ O.o

**Gilbert Beilschmidt** awesome

**Matthew Williams** Gilbert, why are you avoiding me?

**Gilbert Beilschmidt** LALALALALADASALSALAWESOMELA aw, Gilbird just bit somebody's ear.

**Alfred F. Jones** Heya, Matt!

**Matthew Williams** Oh, Alfred!

**Arthur Kirkland** EVERYONE, PLEASE SHUT THE BLOODY FUCKING HELL UP, MY PHONE KEEPS ON VIBRATING BECAUSE ALL OF THIS BLOOMING SHITE GOING ON.  
>[<strong>Francis Bonnefoy<strong> _and_ **Lovino** **Vargas** _like this_]

**Alfred F. Jones** ...PMSing much, broski?

**Arthur Kirkland** Go eat up your pathetic protein shakes that will inevitably make you fatter, Jones. Do it. I dare you.  
>[<strong>Gilbert Beilschmidt<strong>, **Lovino Vargas**, **Francis Bonnefoy**, _and_ **thirty-six** _others like this_]

**Alfred F. Jones** wwhat? But i trusted them! DDDDDDD: どうして？

**Kiku Honda** ..."Why"? (・・？））

**Alfred F. Jones** ( ´ ▽ ` )ﾉ 何？かわいい ヅラララ 素晴らしい

**Kiku Honda** "What", "Cute", "Durarara", and "Awesome". Alfred-san, how, um, very...weeaboo of you. (･_･;

**Alfred F. Jones** I'm not a weeaboo, Kiku!  
>。・゜・(ノД`)・゜・。<p>

**Kiku Honda** Ah... (−_−;)

**Arthur Kirkland** Just ignore him, love.

**Alfred F. Jones** love?

**Arthur Kirkland** Hm?

**Alfred F. Jones** ...

**Kiku Honda** Arthur-san, I asked you to not call me that...

* * *

><p>"..."<p>

"Kiku, do you have any manga where the main protagonist — who _is_ the awesomest character in the entire story — is best friends with some girl, and then the chick decides to fall in love with some unawesome guy, and then the protagonist realises that he might actually like the girl?"

The Asian male blinked. "I know about twenty of those manga story lines, Gilbert-kun." He admitted immediately, feeling sheepish about it. Well, it was a cliché plot, now that he thought about it.

"Did the awesome protagonist ever get the girl back...?" The albino inquired quietly, sounding despondent. Dammit, but he didn't like Mattie that way, didn't he? He just wanted his best friend back, that was all there was to it. Kiku paused thoughtfully, mind flashing through various manga and anime that had something similar to what Gilbert had asked.

"Ah...I believe so," Kiku informed him, before he hesitated. "If I may ask, why are you asking me about shōjo mangas?"

Gilbert shifted uncomfortably, not to eager on the thought of telling someone — even Kiku — about his predicament. And even though both were seated on the beanbag chairs of the library, secluded from all the unawesome nerds and the bitchy student-librarian (Eduard von Bock — the bastard always shushed him), he couldn't help, but feel uneasy. However, Kiku was polite, understanding, trustworthy, and quiet. Something most of his friends weren't. But Gilbert couldn't say anything about his predicament... "Well, I — well, I'd like to borrow some of your manga...?"

"... I'd recommend _Ouran High School Host Club_," Kiku said slowly, reaching into his bag and pulling out several volumes of said series chocked full of bishounens, cross-dressing, breakage of the Fourth Wall, and many clichés of shōjo/shoujo manga. "I also have others in the shounen category..." Kiku fished through his items and took out twelve books, all volume ones. Gilbert wondered how strong the little Japanese male was, seeing how he had to carry all those manga and textbooks. "_Toradora_... _Card Captor Sakura_, _Ao No Exorcist_... _Chobits_... _The Melancholy of Haruhi Suzumiya_..."

Gilbert let out an awkward chuckle, taking the first manga he'd recommended from Kiku. "This one looks awesome enough for me..." He peered at the cover of the volume, which had two young men, one very feminine looking. "The one with the flowers looks awesome."

"Ah, yes, Fujioka Haruhi-sama. She's an interesting character," Kiku agreed quietly, flipping through one of his books gently.

"... '_She_'?" Gilbert repeated, looking confused. "Is this some book about transvestites?"

"No, no, Haruhi just cross-dresses."

"...What?"

"Perhaps you should just read _Pandora Hearts_. One of the characters is named Gilbert..."

"I'll take it!"

"Beilschmidt, I can hear your voice!"

Gilbert stuck his tongue out in aggravation, even though the Estonian couldn't even see him. Kiku smiled slightly, before he was tackled by an overactive Italian. The Japanese teen coloured red with embarrassment, slightly pushing off Feliciano. Feliciano smiled cheerfully, plopping down beside the two on the carpet floor. "Feliciano-kun... Where's Ludwig-kun?" Kiku inquired curiously, carefully placing his beloved books into his bag.

"Hm, I think he was talking to Matthew, but I got bored so I came here!"

"_MATTHEW_?"

"BEILSCHMIDT!"

"Sorry, von Bock!" Gilbert yelled out, before he jumped to his feet. "Feliciano, is Luddy bringing Matthew here?" Feliciano nodded unsurely. _Oh, no_, Gilbert thought, _this can't be happening...I can't see him, what if I start crying again? I don't even know what's wrong with me. Maybe I should see a doctor. Or a therapist. _"Damn, I have to leave. I just remembered that Francis needs my help with his work. I'll see you later, Kiku, Feli."

Kiku watched the Prussian albino leave quickly, pondering on why he was so eager to leave. Matthew was very close to Gilbert. He was usually overjoyed when the Canadian was around, so why was he so saddened at the mere mentioning of Matthew-san? Possibly a fight, an argument could have risen. Arthur had said that Matthew was very scary when extremely angered. "Feliciano, did Ludwig ever ask Gilbert if he and Matthew had a fight?" He wondered to the Italian, who placed a finger to his lip.

"...No, I don't think they had a fight." Feliciano responded calmly, eyebrows furrowed. "Matthew was looking for Gilbert desperately. And when they get into arguments, Gilbert always apologises first. Now that I think about it, something unusual is going on, ve."

Kiku frowned. "I wonder what happened between the both of them..."

* * *

><p><strong>AN: Let's see... I updated? Ah... I never thought I could write 5000 words. 'Twas amazing. I'm leaning toward PruCan, stuck between USUK and AsaKiku and Ameripan, and I ship IcelandxDenmark. Blame the MMDs I've been watching. Like the Butterfly on Your Right Shoulder one where Iceland and Denmark were dancing...**

**I was thinking of 화살/Quasimodo by 샤이니/SHINee when I was attempting to write Gilbert's feelings. Damn. I failed at that scene, didn't I...? It was so...erf. Eh.  
><strong>


	4. fjórir

_No More Peace_

© happy-synthesiser

_Hetalia_

© Hidekaz Himaruya

* * *

><p><strong>chapter <strong> fjórir<strong>**

* * *

><p>"Matthew."<p>

The Canadian froze in his tracks, blinking at the sight of Ludwig and Feliciano. Ludwig had a small frown on his face as Feliciano was babbling about how he wanted to go to Japan and pasta and siestas. Matthew smiled awkwardly, pushing up his glasses as he greeted the two European males. "L - Ludwig, Feliciano," He said softly, holding a hand up in a small wave. Matthew didn't see Gilbert with them, which confused him. He hadn't seen him around any of his usual friends, which consisted of Francis, Antonio, Roderich (which didn't count exactly as a friend; Gilbert just liked to make fun of the Austrian before getting threatened by a certain fujoshi-minded Hungarian), Juan Machado [1], and Neeraja Patel [1]. Gilbert had... acquaintances, but he mostly hung around those people since most of them actually enjoyed being in his company (surprisingly).

"Ah, Matteo, do you like gelato? Do you? I like gelato!"

Why did people always give him different names? First Matthieu, now Matteo... Matthew fidgeted uncomfortably, "I - I don't think I've ever eaten gelato before, sorry..." The look on Feliciano's face was pure horror. How was this possible? Never had gelato? Which meant that he was failing as a representative of Repubblica italianna!

"I SHALL TAKE YOU TO LA BELLA TERRA D'ITALIA FOR GELATO ONE DAY, MATTEO!" Ludwig winced at Feliciano's volume. The Italian was even sobbing at Matthew's expense. Oh, Feliciano pitied anyone who never had gelato. It was... almost a sin! "Oh Dio, per favore lasciate che Matteo mangiare gelato!"

"_Oh God, please let Matteo eat gelato_!"

Now, if Matthew had never eaten pasta, Feliciano would most probably take the Canadian to his place. He would then proceed to cook delicious pasta and force feed the dish to Matthew. And then he would eat pasta himself. Because everyone _needs_ pasta. _Everyone_.

"Um..." Matthew was at a loss for words. He didn't know much (or any, for that matter) Italian, but he was kind of sure that "Dio" meant God in Italian... He recognised Matteo and gelato, but the rest? No idea. "Thank you, Feliciano?" He responded unsurely, not completely certain about whatever the Italian was babbling on about.

Although, gelato was Italian ice cream, wasn't it? Hm, maybe if had it spread over pancakes. Gelato pancakes? He should definitely make chocolate chip pancakes when he got home — oh, they were one of Gilbert's favourites! Perhaps he could bring some to the Prussian later. If he didn't keep running away from Matthew...

"No need! I'm happy to provide my friends with delicious gelato!" Feliciano smiled brightly, leaving Matthew to smile back happily. So, Feliciano considered him as one of his friends... "Ludwig, we should have a gelato party! With rigatoni alla carbonara! And trenette al pesto! Fratello can be the bartender along with Fratello Antonio. He makes great cocktails and aperitifs, especially negroni, and — hm, I wanna have a cocktail with gelato! I wonder how it would taste? We should have those during the gelato party! I wonder who we could invite? Oh, Fratello Francis, Arthur, Feliks, Kiku, maybe Tino..."

Matthew and Ludwig didn't know what to say to the babbling Feliciano. "We'll discuss this later. Also, we can't have pasta if it's a gelato theme party," Ludwig told Feliciano firmly, and the Italian pouted in response before running off, "now, Matthew, I'd like to ask you about something..."

"It's about Gilbert, isn't it?" Matthew forced a smile, letting out a small sigh. The Prussian had been ignoring him, and when Gilbert wasn't ignoring him, he was running away. All Matthew wanted to was tell the stupid idiot about him and Alfred kissing. Matthew had expected him to disapprove of him and Alfred (since every time Matthew mentioned Alfred, Gilbert would pout), but — wait, Gilbert didn't even know he and Alfred had kissed. So...

_It was something _I_ did?_ Matthew thought suddenly, eyes widening. _Did I do something wrong? Did I say he would never be awesome?  
><em>

Matthew paused to rethink what he'd been doing. Things were fine last week. On Friday, they'd walked home together. Then, on Saturday, things were different. Even though Gilbert said he had hosted the strange, weekly BTT Sleepovers, Gilbert always managed to make it to Matthew's for pancakes. Even when he was sick. Matthew had attempted to phone Gilbert several times to no avail.

"I'm sure you've noticed," Ludwig interrupted Matthew's thoughts, his blue eyes gazing straight at the nervous Canadian, "that Gilbert _hasn't_ been himself." _More like an understatement_, Ludwig mused. "In fact, he's doing every chore in the house correctly, and he's actually being helpful instead of saying, '_I am much too awesome to dust that vase, West_.' Francis and Antonio haven't said much. I have a feeling they know something, but not a lot.

"Even though I'm grateful for Gilbert's assistance and... singing, I would like to have my old brother back. Perhaps you could shed some light on what has happened to him?" Ludwig's deep voice sounded deeply hopeful. It just felt strange to have Gilbert that way. He even offered to do laundry. Gilbert never did laundry. _Ever_. He'd always thrown his clothes haphazardly around his room. It was like hell had officially frozen over. Ludwig suddenly imagined Feliciano bursting in with, "This is madness! Madness...? This is SPARTA!" Well, he had heard Feliciano and Antonio and a reluctant Lovino scream it before. It didn't match with Feliciano and Antonio's happy tones, though. Lovino just sounded plain grumpy. The trio didn't sound the least bit ferocious in Ludwig's mind.

_No more American films for Feliciano_, Ludwig idly decided. He had Jones to blame for that.

Now, both of them had not noticed a Prussian rolling his eyes around the corner. Oh, Matthew looked beautiful. With those long lashes, his luscious, blonde hair, those nimble, thin fingers, his slender, gorgeous body, and those loving, violet eyes that Gilbert could spend hours and hours gazing into just to see what Matthew thought and felt —

_DAMMIT, GILBERT._

_Think of Gilbird and chirping, just not about how smooth Mattie's skin_ _—  
><em>

_VERDAMMT, GILBERT.  
><em>

"That sounds horrible!" Matthew gasped. _Really, is it that hard for people to believe I can actually do shit?_ Gilbert groaned in irritation. _I'm even awesomely eavesdropping._ His red eyes immediately softened at the saddened expression on Matthew's lovely face. "B - But I'm sorry, Ludwig, I don't really know what's going on with Gilbert. He's been ignoring me all day; he keeps running away whenever I call out to him..."

Matthew felt tears prick at the corner of his eyes. What could he have done to make Gilbert so angry at him?

Ludwig coughed awkwardly, because the only people he ever really comforted would have to truly be Feliciano and Gilbert. Kiku had other people to run to, like his Chinese brother or Taiwanese sister. How did that even work? Adoption? "Gilbert is with Kiku in the library," Ludwig voiced out making Matthew feel a tad bit hopeful, "would you like to see him?" Matthew nodded stiffly, wanting to settle things over.

"I'd like that. He is my best friend, after all."

"I'll make sure he stays to talk to you, then."

_Too late, you traitor of a Bruder_, Gilbert stuck his tongue out, stalking into the nearby washrooms to hide himself. He smiled pridefully, hands shoved into his uniform's pockets. The Prussian couldn't help but think of Matthew, though. Of course his awesome plan of avoiding Matthew was working perfectly, but Gilbert had half the mind to rush over to Mattie and beg him to dump that stupid American bastard.

_No, Gilbert, stay strong!_ Read the manga Kiku let you use... except not in a washroom where people come to pee in. Around three minutes had passed, so he guessed that he could go out. As he stepped out of the room, Gilbert pondered on where he should go. So few choices.

_Not to my friends, they'd easily lead Matthew to me. The library was out of the question, obviously. The courtyard? Nah, they'd see me out the windows..._

"Gilbert?"

_Oh, God noooooo, not him. Why of all people, himmmm?_ "Roddy," Gilbert plastered on a smirk, eying the Austrian with slight annoyance, "fancy seeing you around these parts."

"I find it more of a surprise; you're hardly anywhere near the library." Roderich mentioned honestly, frowning as he noticed Gilbert's false, forced looks. Something was off. "Is there something bothering you?"

Yes, Gilbert would totally tell the guy he bullied his problems. "No way, I'm feeling awesomely awesome. Maybe even awesomer than awesome." He swallowed in his throat. "Uh... Is...she stalking you right now?" Gilbert inquired nervously, eyes darting to the hallway behind Roderich. There could be no other who Gilbert was implying to, and Roderich knew exactly who the Prussian was asking about.

"Elizabeta is not stalking me," He said firmly, "she just tends to enjoy being in my company."

"Sure," Gilbert snorted, "I guess it must hurt to be dumped by your boyfriend for another boy, though." Roderich became flustered at the implication. He did not dump Elizabeta for Vash, but that was around the time that he and the Swiss had become... for lack of a better term, "acquaintances". But every time Vash looked his way, and actually, _actually_ said, "Hello, Roderich," instead of ignoring him completely, he couldn't help the feeling of butterflies in his stomach. Roderich had felt that way initially with Elizabeta, but their relationship just lost its spark.

Elizabeta had still insisted on being a part of his everyday life; showing up at his house for breakfast and other meals, coincidentally showing up at the market when he went shopping, or consistently helping him all over school. That wasn't stalking, was it? She just wanted to hang out with Roderich like back in the old times. Definitely _not_ stalking.

Gilbert smirked knowingly. "It's so true, Roddy. What was his name? Vash, right? Bastard's trigger happy." Roderich stiffened at the mention of that, choosing to ignore the Prussian's words.

"Gilbert, I would like reiterate; what is bothering you?" Roderich inquired once again, eyebrows furrowed. He was used to Gilbert's constant teasing, but something seemed genuinely off about his once enemy. They were on better terms, but they weren't particularly kind to each other.

The albino scoffed, leaning against the golden-painted wall. "You wouldn't understand, Roderich," He sighed stressfully, mind drifting back to Matthew and Alfred. His heart hurt again, whenever those two names made way into his head. "This is not a thing I would ever want to discuss with you." Gilbert straightened up, stalking away.

"Ludwig has expressed his concern for you," Roderich called out to him, frowning, "he says things have been strange with you."

"So?" Gilbert scoffed.

"Wait! I... I am also lost."

"You got lost in your own house, Roderich!"

"It is not my fault, Gilbert!"

Francis and Antonio watched the two German speaking males leave, one with a serious face, the other smiling obliviously. "Gilbert is actually being kind to Roderich... What has the world come to, Antonio?" Francis sighed dramatically, gazing back to the Spaniard. "Didn't you date Roderich?" He briefly thought back to the period when the two actually dated. Why he did it, nobody even knew. Gilbert and Francis managed to break them up, however.

Gilbert had always complained about Roderich, even saying he was "_a stupid aristocrat who clusters_". Anything that came out of Gilbert's mouth that had to do with Roderich was always negative. Francis had no clue as to why, but it may have been because of the fights both had in the past. Gilbert also hated Ivan, but that could be easily explained. Ivan'd almost strangled Gilbert, but Gilbert had bullied Ivan in the past...

"Yes, but he can act like a puta [2]!" Antonio said happily, eyes closing as his lips curved upward. Francis gazed in shock. "Ah, sorry! He's a pinche pendejo?" Francis blinked in shock before shaking his head. Well, that was certainly new. Antonio had a very built up animosity for his ex-boyfriend. "So, what's wrong with Gilbert?"

Francis chuckled, patting Antonio's brown head fondly. "I'll tell you before I decide to talk to Arthur."

"Okay!"

* * *

><p>"Oh, bloody hell."<p>

Arthur frowned as he slumped in his seat, arms crossed. The blonde tsundere gently sipped on his Earl Grey tea, absentmindedly rubbing the warm cup that encased it. Francis sat across from him, flanked by a humming Antonio and a scowling Lovino. Well, Peter Kirkland, Arthur's aggravating younger brother, was reluctantly beside him. So was a napping Heracles Karpusi, who was currently doing a project with Arthur.

Or _was_.

Since Francis decided to drop by, by the loveliest thing known as: "coincidence".

"Ah, good thing Peter had informed me that you were here," Francis bit down on his snack, as Artie proceeded to glare at his innocently whistling brother, "I've been meaning to talk to you, Arthur."

Well, turns out "coincidence" died down the drain.

The Briton blinked in amazement, surprised something non-perverted had actually omitted from the Frenchman's mouth. He continued glaring at an "oblivious" looking Peter, who was currently digging into his sponge cake with great attention. "Exactly about what?" Arthur inquired with a sigh, reckoning it wasn't something entirely important. Besides, he still had to finish the report with Karpusi, whose narcoleptic behaviour wasn't the least bit helpful.

"It's about Matthieu, Gilbert, and Alfred."

"What about my cousin and the fat git? And Beilschmidt, as well." Arthur raised a furry eyebrow, biting into one of the scones he'd packed as a snack. Everybody else at the table ('cept for Heracles), flinched at the sight of the burnt scones, shuddering uncontrollably. "My food is not disgusting, you blimey prats," He grumbled out.

Lovino snorted right away. "Are you shitting me? My fratello thought your food was so horrible that he had stomach pains." Antonio giggled beside Lovino, ruffling his hair fondly. "You and that hamburger bastard have the same disgusting tastes."

"Be — Belt up!"

Francis cleared his throat loudly, redirecting the attention to himself. "Arthur, do you realise that someone else is in love with Matthieu?" He asked him mysteriously, face completely blank.

"Ooh, I know who!"

"Shut up, you bastard, we all know!"

"Hey, I don't know!"

"Peter, quit pissing around..." Arthur said warningly, before turning back to Francis warily. "I wasn't aware of that," He replied, "not a lot of people notice him —" Arthur's eyes widened as he recalled Francis's earlier claim. "Oh, blast it all — it's Beilschmidt, isn't it? How could I have been so ruddy daft?" He exclaimed, gobsmacked. "Everything's going to be at sixes and sevens!"

Everyone at the table ('cept for Karpusi and Peter), looked bewildered.

"'Sixes and sevens'...?"

"The hell does that mean?"

"'Quit pissing around'...?"

"_Off_ the fucking topic."

"'Ruddy daft'...?"

"Shut up, tomato bastard!"

"Blast —?"

"_Antonio_!"

"Francis, why are you telling me this?" Arthur inquired with a frown, setting down his tea carefully. The table quieted down as Francis twirled his finger on a strand of wavy blonde hair. "Because I honestly don't know what to say concerning this."

The Frenchman sighed in response, standing up from his seat as he spoke. "I want you to know, that while Gilbert is still in denial, I want him and Matthieu to be together," He said bluntly, arms crossed, "and I _will_ get them together." Francis finished determinedly, gazing straight at Arthur. With Francis's awesome Matchmaking Powerz, the Frenchman could definitely do it.

"... Are you telling me you're going to sabotage my baby cousin's relationship with my best friend?" Arthur accused him angrily, his chair scraping against the floor as he stood. He glared at Bonnefoy, setting his delicious (disgusting) snack aside as he spoke. "I _won't_ allow that, Francis! Matthew is perfectly happy —" He paused abruptly, remembering what Matthew was like during the day when he couldn't find Gilbert. Sad. Without Beilschmidt. Oh goodness, what horrid thing had transpired? Matthew would never be truly happy with Alfred if Beilschmidt was gone!

"All I'm saying, mon trésor," Francis smiled kindly, petting Arthur's cheek fondly, "is I'm going to make mon petit Matthieu realise the one he's in love with is not Alfred, but Gilbert." With that, Francis, Antonio, and Lovino decided to take their leave, leaving a flabbergasted Arthur in their wake.

"_Bonnefoy_," He called out harshly, shaking his head as his green eyes narrowed, "what of Alfred's feelings? Don't they matter in this situation at all?"

All Arthur could hear was the close of the quiet café's door.

"Whoa, intense," Peter whistled out, before darting up, "I think I'm gonna go see Dad and Mum." He didn't spare Arthur a second glance as he ran away, who didn't bother to chase after the smaller blonde.

Heracles yawned loudly, before his half-lidded eyes landed on a seething Arthur. "We... had the project thing, right?" He reminded the foul looking Briton, slumping over the long table tiredly. Arthur nodded with a sigh, pulling out the papers needed for the assignment.

The fact that Francis was just going to sabotage Alfred and Matthew's relationship nagged at his mind, however. He wanted Matthew to be happy, sure, but with Alfred...? Arthur cleared his throat, gently pulling on the collar of his dress shirt. He needed more tea — possibly mixed with alcohol. No, that wouldn't be right... Maybe just alcohol, then.

Francis watched the Brit from the café door before turning away to face Antonio and Lovino.

"This is going to be fun!"

"'_Fun_'?" Lovino snorted in derision, decked out in his designer clothing. Ugh, why was he going to help those potato bastards? They didn't do anything except be potato bastards. "I'd rather not help, but it would make Feli sad..." Antonio smiled down at Lovino, gently pressing a kiss to the Italian's forehead. Lovino flushed red immediately, sputtering out jumbled curses in Italian and Spanish. "H - _Hey_!"

"Aw, you're so sweet, Lovi," Antonio cooed, pressing more kisses to the Italian's cheeks and forehead, "I'm so happy you're mine." Francis watched in pure amusement as Lovino let himself be cuddled and adored by Antonio — in public — surprisingly. Perhaps it was only because their anniversary was fast approaching? Sure, the two had fights, but this was adorable.

_Now_, Francis thought absentmindedly, _why can't Gilbert and Matthieu be like that?_

And as he facepalmed, he already knew the answer. _Stupid question_. Francis sighed, taking out his cell and dialing the number of a trusted organisation. "Ah, yes, Kiku? This is Francis Bonnefoy. Would you mind gathering your group for me...?"

"_Of course, Francis-san. May I ask why, though?_"

"Well, you see, I need some assistance..."

* * *

><p><strong>Team Alfred<strong>: 1 ?  
><strong>Team Gilbert<strong>: 3

* * *

><p><strong>Lukas Bondevik<strong> Call me storebror.  
>[<strong>Simon Densen<strong>, **Tino Väinämöinen**, _and_ **Berwald Oxenstierna** _like this_]

**Ivan Braginski** Hm~?

**Peter Kirkland** Lukas?

**Arthur Kirkland** ?

**Emil Steilsson** ... "Storebror" means older brother.  
>[<strong>Simon Densen<strong> _likes this_]

**Sadık Adnan** You are brothers, aren't you?  
>[<strong>Lukas Bondevik<strong>, **Simon Densen**, _and_ **two** _others like this_]

**Emil Steilsson** I'm NOT calling him storebror or stóri bróðir, pops. I'll never call him it, ever.  
>[<strong>Simon Densen<strong> _likes this_]

**Tino Väinämöinen** Why not? Ah, I just realised most of you have brother or sibling problems. Especially a certain young man named Peter. Cough.  
>[<strong>Berwald Oxenstierna<strong> _likes this_]

**Peter Kirkland** That British jerk isn't my brother, Mum!  
>[<strong>Alfred F. Jones<strong> _likes this_]

**Arthur Kirkland** It's not like anyone would want to be your brother ...

**Raivis Galante** Calm down now, Peter ...

**Yao Wang** Kiku and I don't have any of those problems  
>[<strong>Ivan Braginski<strong> _likes this_]

**Kiku Honda** You've made a mistake. Only you and Yong Soo are brothers. So, I suppose, we don't have any problems surrounding brotherhood since I am not your brother.  
>[<strong>Yong Soo Im<strong> _likes this_]

**Yao Wang** Kiku!  
>[<strong>Ivan Braginski<strong> _likes this_]

**Lars Hendriks** can someone take this stupid Spanish guy out of my house? Emma?  
>[<strong>Arthur Kirkland<strong> _and_ **Lovino Vargas** _like this_]

**Emma Hendriks** Broer, he just wants to spend time with you. Be nice to Antonio.

**Lars Hendriks** I don't want this hufter in my house  
>[<strong>Lovino Vargas<strong> _likes this_]

**Antonio Fernández Carriedo** I just wanna hang out~ since Francis is busy! and lovi is busy too

**Arthur Kirkland** What's the Frog doing?

**Antonio Fernández Carriedo** he's going somewhere with Kiku later

**Arthur Kirkland** WHAT? Kiku!

**Yao Wang** my little brother has already logged off.  
>[<strong>Ivan Braginski<strong> _likes this_]

**Yong Soo Im** Hyung, hyunggg. I'm your brother~!

**Ivan Braginski** Yao~, my pretty Yao~.

**Yao Wang** WHAT? Ivan!  
>[<strong>Ivan Braginski<strong> _likes this_]

**Natalya Arlovskaya** Брат, marry me, marry me, marry me, marry me, marry me, marry me, marry me, and marry me.  
>[<strong>Yao Wang<strong> _likes this_]

**Ivan Braginski** Please leave me alone!

**Feliciano Vargas** I want a GELATO PARTY full of gelato and gelato  
>[<strong>Antonio Fernández Carriedo<strong>, **Gilbert Beilschmidt**, _and_ **Kiku Honda** _like this_]

**Lovino Vargas** why the fuck should we have one?  
>[<strong>Antonio Fernández Carriedo<strong> _likes this_]

**Feliciano Vargas** Because it will be awesome, Fratello! Fratello Toni already agreed to be bartender! I can just imagine it now. All the delicious gelato to consume and cocktails and pasta  
>[<strong>Antonio Fernández Carriedo<strong>, **Ivan Braginski**, _and_ **ten** _others like this_]

**Ludwig Beilschmidt** What do cocktails and pasta have to do with a gelato party, Feliciano?

**Feliciano Vargas** Then its a gelato, pasta, AND drinking party, Luddy!  
>[<strong>Antonio Fernández Carriedo<strong>, **Gilbert Beilschmidt**, _and_ **ten** _others like this_]

**Ludwig Beilschmidt** Feliciano, you know how you get when you drink...

**Feliciano Vargas** I act like Fratello Lovi, don't I?

**Antonio Fernández Carriedo** And Lovi acts like you~.

**Lovino Vargas** oi, SHUT THE FUCK UP  
>[<strong>Antonio Fernández Carriedo<strong> _and_ **Feliciano Vargas** _like this_]

**Feliciano Vargas** GELATO PARTY IT IS  
>[<strong>Yong Soo Im<strong>, **Alfred F. Jones**, **Peter Kirkland**, _and_ **twenty** _others like this_]

**Arthur Kirkland** There is no way in hell am I letting you go to that party, Peter. Over my dead body.

**Peter Kirkland** WAT? mum, dad!

**Tino Väinämöinen** He is right about that, Peter. I'm sorry, you're much too young to attend it.  
>[<strong>Berwald Oxenstierna<strong> _likes this_]

**Peter Kirkland** FINE! Ill have my own party ten. :P

**Arthur Kirkland** "Then"! It's supposed to be "then"!

* * *

><p>"<em>Please<em>?"

"No."

"_Bitte_?"

"Gilbert, why do you want a poster of animated _men_ on your wall?"

"What? Haruhi _is_ a _female_, Ludwig! I've told you that before! But did you listen? No! You never listen to anything I say!"

"I already bought you the entire book set and the anime, for Gott's sake!"

"You don't understand, though! Haruhi is a lowly, _awesome_ commoner like us and adorable! Tamaki is one of the _awesomest_ princely characters — except he should he Prussian, not French! Kyouya is smart and rich, and smarter then Tamaki, so he is therefore _awesomer_ than Tamaki! Hikaru and Kaoru are the _awesomest_ twins in the whole universe and have an _awesome_ (although sometimes "incestuous", but that doesn't matter) brotherly love! Mori is the tallest and strongest and does kendo, so he's almost as _awesome_ as me! And Hunny likes cake and can take down anyone! That's _awesome_! Pure _awesome_!"

"Haruhi-sama, Tamaki-dono, and the others are awesome..." Kiku voiced from his spot on the couch, feeling somewhat guilty. He had inspired this sudden bout of _Ouran High School Host Club_ obsession when he had allowed Gilbert to read volume one. Now, Gilbert had decided to be the awesomest fan in the entire world. Many fangirls would find that complete bull.

Gilbert gestured wildly to Kiku, red eyes flashing. "_See_? Another believer of _Ouran High School Host Club_!"

"Fine," Ludwig sighed loudly as Gilbert began cheering, "but first, you must tell me what's been bothering you." Gilbert blinked. And then he glared at his younger brother. So much for his dreams. Guess he'd have to beg someone else; maybe Toni or Juan. Yeah, Antonio was very clueless (unless drunk, where he would be a very, _very_ scary person, or in less instances, when he was very serious) and Juan looked up to Gilbert. Like an underling.

"Never!" Gilbert screeched in response, grabbing his jacket off the chair he'd slung it over. He put it on, whilst frowning at his younger brother. He patted his head to check on a resting Gilbird. "I'll see you _later_, West." He slammed the front door loudly, showing how sincerely pissed off he was. Ludwig could hear the older man cursing in loud German.

Silence reigned.

"Bruder..."

"I'd like to apologise, Ludwig-kun," Kiku bowed to his fellow friend, "it was I who introduced him into the manga world." Certainly, Kiku was also obsessed with manga (if the large collection of manga/anime and related items that took up a large part of his room wasn't an indication), but Gilbert was new to being a fan of the 2D universe.

"It's fine —"

"あの交差点で みんながもしスキップをして~  
>もしあの街の真ん中で 手をつないで空を見上げたら —" [3]<p>

Kiku coloured in embarrassment, taking out his vibrating and ringing cell. Ludwig raised an eyebrow at the strange Japanese song before turning around to allow the Asian privacy. "Yes?" Kiku paused as the person on the other line spoke. "Of course, Francis-san. May I ask why, though?"

"_Well, you see, I need some assistance..._"

Kiku frowned uneasily, settling down on the couch seat once again. "Please elaborate."

"_You see, I wasn't particularly certain, but since recent events, I am completely sure_," Francis sighed deeply from his side, "_I realised that Gilbert has romantic feelings for Matthieu._"

"...I know. So this is one of the reasons why he has been acting so strangely."

"_Yes, it came as a shock — what? You knew already?_"

Kiku raised a black eyebrow at Francis' words, nodding even though the Frenchman couldn't see him. "I was aware of it before. It was very obvious." Whenever Matthew did something endearing — like flushing when he tripped, or smiling exuberantly — Gilbert had this familiar, loving look on his face. Kiku had seen that face before. He'd seen Ludwig secretly gaze at Feliciano with that look, and seen Berwald frequently send that look in Tino's direction. He'd seen it in acting; during Japanese and Korean dramas he'd watched. He'd seen that look directed toward himself...

"... _Really now? You're very perceptive. Looks like I can't sense amour all that well, then_."

Was that depression emanating from that last sentence...? "O - Oh, Francis-san, I think you know much more about love then others..." Kiku insisted uncertainly, sweatdropping. Honestly, it didn't seem much of a big deal to him.

"_Ah, merci, Kiku!_"

"Now, why would you need our group's help?"

"_I'm going to be honest; I would like to get Gilbert and Matthieu together. With the help of your organisation, of course._"

Kiku smiled. "I'll see what we can do."

"_Let's just hope that Elizabeta can set aside her... hatred for Gilbert._"

* * *

><p><strong>Team Alfred<strong>: 1 ?  
><strong>Team Gilbert<strong>: 4 — _gained 1_

* * *

><p><strong>AN:**

**Now _I_ want gelato...  
><strong>

**[1] - Juan Machado is Cuba. Neeraja Patel is India.**

**[2] - Taken from the English dub when Spain is skipping around since he got control of Romano. He says, "I thought Austria was a puta, but I guess he's nice," or something like that. Spain and Austria were married once because of the House of Hapsburg, apparently.  
><strong>

**[3] - romanization : "ano kousaten de minna ga moshi sukippu wo shite**  
><strong>moshi ano machi no mannaka de te wo tsunaide sora wo miagetara" =<strong>  
><strong>English translation : "If everyone skipped to that intersection<strong>  
><strong>If, in the centre of town, we connected hands and gazed at the sky"<strong>  
><strong>— "PONPONPON" by きゃりーぱみゅぱみゅ But I got the English lyrics from Kagamine Len's cover video. There are <em>so many<em> different translations for that song...**

**After typing _awesome_ so many times, I think I'm forgetting how to spell it correctly... I was checking the traffic stats, and it said that someone from Iceland looked at my stories, and I was so _damn happy_. I want to go to Iceland. I ship SwissAus — is that what it's called? I'm fine with AusHun - er, HunAus? - but I haven't written SwissAus (?) before, so I decided to use it here. Ha, it's actually canon that Prussia's the one that stalks Austria. XD I've never watched Sparta, but I've seen the clip for that. I think I read it in a fic, where someone yelled that...**

**Gilbert's gonna be so in denial for a while. :3 I don't think I addressed before (did I?), but Lukas Bondevik is my name for Norway while Denmark is Simon Densen. Emil Steilsson is what I refer to Iceland as. And if you didn't get the little tidbit where they were all chatting, and Norway mentioned that Iceland should refer to him as big brother, read this (remove the spaces):**  
><strong>www. heta rchive scanl ations  non linear. php ? blog-en try-663**

**And Kugelmugel and Ladonia are very adorable micronations along with Sea-kun and Wy. Seborga, too. In fact, all the micronations are adorable. :3 You should read _It's a Treasure Box of Countries~_. I do think that Austria, Japan, and Iceland are my top favourite characters, but I guess the micronations are as awesome as well.**

**Hm, who's your favourite character in Hetalia?**


	5. πέντε

_No More Peace_

© happy-synthesiser_  
><em>

_Axis Powers: Hetalia _

© Hidekaz Himaruya

* * *

><p><strong>chapter πέντε<strong>

* * *

><p><strong>Team Alfred<strong>: 1 ?  
><strong>Team Gilbert<strong>: 5 — _gained 1 -_ _Feliciano Vargas_

* * *

><p>Berwald Oxenstierna was a man of few words.<p>

He was stoic, quiet, intimidating, and actually very artistic. He liked furniture. He liked Tino. He liked calling Tino his wife. In fact, he liked everything about Tino. He liked the family structure he had. He and Tino were husband and wife, Simon, Emil, and Lukas as his annoying brothers, and Peter as their son. Peter went back in forth between Arthur and them, but Peter never really preferred being around his older brother.

So, when Arthur Kirkland showed up on their doorstep for their help and not for Peter, Berwald and Tino were immediately interested. Berwald was speechless for a moment. "P'ter's n't h're," Berwald had said when he saw the Brit standing outside his house. Arthur was twiddling his thumbs quietly, gazing into the Swede's face. "'r s'mthin' else? W' w'ren't exp'ctin' comp'ny."

Tino was in the kitchen cooking a meal for the both of them, and dammit, that was when Berwald was planning to ask Tino if they wanted to sleep in same room. It was only natural for husbands and wives to sleep in the same room, but when they'd bought the house together, Tino had strangely insisted on sleeping in his own room. Berwald couldn't really show it, but he truly was nervous over the ordeal. Tino was the first person he'd ever felt romantic love for.

Arthur almost flinched under the hardened look (Berwald didn't mean to scare, he was just seriously socially awkward), before speaking. "I didn't know who to go to, so I figured..."

"Y'd c'me here." Berwald finished for him, nodding his blonde head. He opened the door further, allowing the smaller man to enter. Berwald felt his dreams of seeing Tino sleeping beside him again die. Guess I'll ask another time...

"Oh, thank you," Arthur politely thanked him, seating himself on their couch that was a gift from Lukas. The Swede only gave a nod of the head as an acknowledgement, going to get Tino.

He found the Finn humming a folk song in a very fitting apron. "Berwald!" Tino Väinämöinen smiled at him, violet eyes catching sight of the taller man. "Guess what? I made a pate with golden chanterelles!" Berwald Oxenstierna froze at the Finn's words. "I also have salmiakki, if you..." Tino's grip on the package of salty food slackened as he peered at the Swede. "Berwald? Are you okay?"

"W' r'lly h've to g't married," Berwald finally spoke, kneeling down on one knee and popping out a ring from hammer space. Tino blinked, before flushing pink. "I d'dn't kn'w you h'd gold'n chanterelles..."

Tino, who had been officially dubbed as Berwald's "wife" did not except this in the least. He'd denied it the first few times, before giving up on trying to convince Berwald otherwise. Tino had been fearful of the intimidating male until he realised he actually might have liked him. But being proposed to?

"Berwald, I —"

"Excuse me?" Arthur knocked on the doorframe, green eyes fixated on the scene before him. "Oh, did I interrupt something...?"

Berwald stood up from his spot as a flushed Tino shook his head frantically. The British blonde raised an eyebrow as Tino threw off his apron. "A - Arthur!" Tino greeted the Englishman hastily, walking forward. "What, uh, are you doing here?" He smiled anxiously, hands clasped in front of him.

"I'd like for you to give me some advice and maybe help me...?" Arthur inquired hopefully. "Both of you, of course."

"Of course, let's just talk elsewhere..."

Berwald watched Tino and Arthur leave, sighing. Tino looked as if he'd say yes. "Berwald?" Arthur called out from the door, and he followed the two.

Tino and Berwald settled down on one of the sofas that Berwald had skillfully built, while Arthur sat opposite from the group. Both waited patiently for what Arthur was going to say. "You two are the most sensible — and sane, for that matter — people that I've met," Arthur began, "and I would have gone to Kiku if some Frog bastard hadn't already." Berwald looked to Tino, and the blonde mouthed _Francis_. "But, you see, Francis approached me, and I'm confused on what to do. You see, Alfred and Matthew have started a relationship."

"They have?" Tino inquired curiously.

Berwald blinked. "I th'nk I 'dded 'im on F'ceb'k..."

"Yes, well, Francis wants to break them up," Arthur continued hastily, "and I'm just gobsmacked."

"That's not right!" Tino exclaimed with a frown, eyebrows furrowed. "I mean, they do like each other. Breaking them apart would be wrong."

Arthur nodded his blonde head, "I agree. But Francis said that Matthew was deluding himself, and that he actually likes... Gilbert." He added in, remembering the events of when Francis crashed his study time and made him receive an average on his presentation. Damn him. An average grade. How was Arthur supposed to live now, with that grade hanging over his head.

"Well, if Matthew liked Gilbert, he would be dating Gilbert," Tino reasoned to the Brit, trying to convince him otherwise. It didn't make sense at all. Although, people could like two different people at the same time... "Don't worry about it, Arthur."

The furry eyebrowed blonde frowned, rubbing his forehead. "How can I not worry?" He demanded frustratingly. "Matthew could like Alfred and Gilbert, but he's never happy without Gilbert. Then, Alfred will end up heartbroken, and —"

"D'n't w'rry 'bout it." Berwald interrupted, face blank.

"Yeah, Arthur, we'll help you!" Tino smiled assuringly, promising. "Berwald and I'll help you keep Matthew and Alfred together."

A smile stretched across Arthur's lips, and he let out a relieved sigh. Finally, people with common sense. Now, if only he could convince Kiku and Francis otherwise. "Thank you, Tino, Berwald," He responded gratefully, "it helps."

Although, not really. Since Arthur had no idea that Francis was beating the crap out of Team Alfred.

* * *

><p><strong>Team Alfred<strong>: 3 — _gained 2_  
><strong>Team Gilbert<strong>: 5

* * *

><p>"Kiku, why are we having a meeting?"<p>

"Yeah, we just had one a few days ago..."

The Asian male smiled nervously at the group of females (with four males, as well). He coughed into his small, pale fist, deeply wishing that Francis would know how to arrive on time. _What was that saying again? Fashionably late? Yes. Francis-san is probably trying to be "fashionably late"._ _But there is no need to be "fashionably late". Or he may be flirting with anything that has a pulse_, Kiku wondered bitterly. "I gathered you here for a reason, because someone asked for our services."

"Really?" Lili Zwingli asked excitedly, smiling. "Who? Is it somebody who needs help with his love life?" She glanced at her older brother, Vash Zwingli, who was currently ignoring the Austrian beside him. Vash had insisted on being at the meetings because he wanted to watch over her. Kiku was fine with it, since he and Vash were friends. But why use Roderich's house... She'd have to ask Elizabeta, who was busily conversing with Katyusha about who the mysterious person was. The Hungarian was the one who offered up Roderich's place, and she knew that Vash always accompanied his little sister. Even though he disapproved of the club and her being in it.

Kiku chuckled awkwardly, sitting down in his chair. "You could say that, but he's doing it for his friend."

"Oh. That seems sweet of him," Michelle said thoughtfully, taking in the food Roderich had laid out.

He smiled at his members, before remembering to take count of who was present. Well, Kiku didn't need to take count of Roderich and Vash, so they were just guests. Elizabeta was there — always — in a conversation with Katyusha Braginski and Peter. Paulette, Peter's recently made friend and new member, was beside him, as well as Luciano Vargas — the Vargas brothers' cousin. Katyusha was next to her...erm, lovely sister, Natalya Arlovskaya. Emma Hendriks was in front of Lili and beside Mei Xiao, his little sister. Michelle was near the end of the table, talking to Luciano. So, everyone was present, but the Frenchie was still late.

Kiku had time to dwell over his group's recent news. Peter had informed him that he was attempting to recruit some of his friends, which were five males. Elizabeta managed to get extremely adorable pictures of Lovino and Antonio. Lili had convinced Berwald and Tino to kiss. All of those were good news, and they were progressing very well.

Now, Kiku could sense that there was also some unfinished business. He saw Roderich glance over to Vash several times, but the Swiss male didn't even look back. Although Kiku itched to speak to his organisation about possibly taking this case up, he was worried for Elizabeta's feelings. She would be crushed, and Kiku would feel guilty. He'd also lose his top member and the greatest vice-president ever. W_hy are so many male students in our school homosexual, anyway?_ Kiku wondered. _Myself... included._

"You noticed, too?" Lili interrupted Kiku's thoughts, and he glanced at the blonde haired girl. He eyed the seat beside her, which was currently empty. "Brüetsch needed to use the washroom," She informed him calmly, hands clasped, "but, you noticed?"

He nodded his head, gazing into her green eyes. "Yes. I'd like to make it one of my missions, but..."

"Elizabeta," Lili supplied immediately, nodding her blonde head, "I still don't know how she feels about it. But if she's never going to heal if she's always near Roderich." Kiku agreed quietly, subtly glancing to a laughing Elizabeta. "Although, we don't have to necessarily _make_ it a mission..."

"How so?"

"I could ask Brüetsch to help us out. Maybe even Roderich," Lili contemplated thoughtfully, resting a hand on her chin, "do you think it might work? They may become closer." Before Kiku could answer, the double doors flew open, revealing a flamboyant, pansexual Frenchman.

"Ah, je suis désolé! I decided to come fashionably late!"

Francis was smiling brightly, with a pink-faced Vash and a red Roderich by his side. Feliciano and Lovino were next to Francis as well, Feliciano giggling and Lovino triumphantly cackling. The two brothers stalked over to their younger cousin, greeting him. Francis strode in proudly, holding several roses in his hands. Kiku groaned inwardly. The Frenchman held one out to Michelle, winking at her. She wrinkled her nose, fidgeting in her blue dress.

"Vous cherchez une belle comme jamais, Michelle!" He held out the red rose to her with a flourish, and she begrudgingly took it into her hand.

"_You're looking as beautiful as ever, Michelle!_"

Michelle smiled, speaking brightly. "Vous êtes boiteux, Francis."

"_You're lame, Francis._"

"You broke my heart, mon ami~," Francis pursed his lips, before twirling over to the next girl and completely ignoring Peter and Luciano. "Oh, I haven't seen you around before! What is your name?" Paulette blinked owlishly, before Francis took her hand and kissed it. "You're going to look lovely when you're older," He purred to her, before handing her a rose, "a rose for a blooming flower herself." She took it curiously, sniffing the plant adorably. Peter and Luciano glared at the Frenchman.

"Katyusha~," Francis smiled at her brightly, "your hair looks fantastic. I just adore your headband." She accepted the rose shyly, flushing pink. He gazed to the person beside her, before flinching right away. Natalya was glaring at him, and — was that a glint of a sharp, polished knife? Francis gulped readily, handing her a rose without saying anything. She didn't touch it, so Francis hastily left it on the space in front of her.

He chuckled nervously, gliding to Mei and tucking a strand of black hair behind her ear. She shivered. "Ah, an Asian beauty! Just like Kiku~." Kiku inwardly shivered. "And for the very pretty Emma and Elizabeta," Francis held out the last roses to the blonde and brunette, who both smiled politely. He clapped his hands, resting them on his hips.

"Why didn't _I_ get a flower...?" Peter pouted dejectedly. "I deserve one, aren't I pretty?" Luciano shook his head in response. "It's not fair..."

"Francis." Kiku called out uncomfortably, standing up from his seat as Vash and Roderich rejoined the table. The blonde hummed in response, striding forward to Kiku's spot.

"Kiku, mon ami," Francis gently pressed kisses to the Asian's pale cheeks, making the male flush and shove the European away abruptly, "so adorable." He smirked, eyes sliding over to a certain Swiss and Austrian. "I saw something _very_ exciting when I came here, Kiku."

"...Ah?"

"Well, I had just arrived here with Feliciano and Lovino." Francis ignored the glares he was receiving from Roderich and Vash. Kiku frowned immediately, sensing that something possibly horrible would be coming from the Frenchman's mouth. Most people in the room tensed as Francis ignorantly continued. "We were looking for this room, oui. Feliciano had lived here for awhile, so we could easily find our way around. However...

"We saw a scene that I never think would've happened. Roderich, holding Vash's face in his hands. It was amour! His palms gently cradled Vash's face, and I could hear Roderich saying, '_I miss you, Vash. E - Even if you don't feel the same, please just be with me..._'" Francis sighed dreamily, gesturing his hands to the two, bright red main protagonists of this non-fictional story we was telling. "It was too bad we appeared! They might have even kissed. Ah, I feel l'amour in the air!"

He continued to babble on about love as Kiku and Lili sent each other looks, both terrified for Elizabeta. They gazed at the brunette, who was currently — _smiling_. What? She smiled at the pair, hands clasped in front of her. Most of the club, who are greatly aware of Elizabeta's past relationship, and Feliciano were more preoccupied with the Hungarian than the Austrian and Swiss. Francis caught on after a moment, frowning.

"Did... I hit a nerve?" He whispered to Kiku, who could only give a slight nod.

Vash, however, had had enough of Francis's nonsense. So, like the peaceful, neutral person he was, he decided to pull out his lovely gun. "I'll gun you down, you putain de trou du cul! Je vais fermer votre bouche avec mon fusil, Sie Französisch Schlampe!" He shouted angrily, mashing together French and German. "È dannatamente fastidioso Français Arschgesicht!"

"He mixed Italian, French, and German...?"

"He said, '_You damn annoying_...'" Lovino and Feliciano voiced from their spots, speaking in unison. Creepy.

Michelle nodded. "'..._French_...'"

"...'_assface_.'" Roderich softly said, embarrassed.

"He also called him a '_fucking asshole_' and said, '_I'll shut your mouth up with my gun_,'" Michelle added in awkwardly, "wow..."

Roderich shifted uncomfortably. "Vash also said, '— _you French tramp_.' I do think he was referring to the other meaning, however..."

"Which is...?"

"Slu," Roderich began, before pausing, "_t_."

Vash seethed under his breathe, gun pointed straight at Francis. The blonde froze immediately, eying the Swiss's SIG P220 pistol quietly. Lili stood up, grasping at her brother's hands. "Brüetsch, calm down," She begged pleadingly, pulling down on the pistol gently, "please, you're scaring me..." He gazed into her similar green eyes, his grip on his trusted, semi-automatic weapon weakening as she pleaded with him. "Thank you, Brüetsch," Lili sighed, relieved that Vash was gaining back his common sense. He also had another one of those guns safely stashed somewhere else on his body, and she didn't want him to massacre them all.

"Vash..." Roderich said worriedly, placing a hand on the blonde's shoulder. Vash coloured, shoving off the hand and slumping into his seat. The Austrian seemed crestfallen before he sat as well.

Kiku sent Lili a grateful look, because he honestly didn't want Francis to die or have Vash arrested for murder. He cleared his throat loudly, demanding the attention up front. There were times to be polite, but Kiku was the president of this organisation. He needed to get on with this meeting and start planning. He had to show he was the leader in order to continue.

"Francis called me and asked for our assistance," Kiku explained tiredly, mind subconsciously wandering to the glorious days of hikikomori. Oh, those times were great. Even when Lars had tried to force sunlight on him. "He wants us to help Gilbert."

Elizabeta stood up, smiling calmly. "Well, Kiku, I should be leaving! I have a..." She looked at Roderich, urging him to find an excuse."

"Actually, Elizabeta, you cleared your schedule for the entire day for this meeting..." Roderich gazed at her curiously, clearly confused by her actions. Kiku could already guess about what was happening.

"Elizabeta, please," The Asian stressed softly, walking over to her, "this isn't about Gilbert. It's about helping those who need it." He felt exhausted from all these events. _Hikikomori_, he immediately chanted, _hikikomori_, _hikikomori_... "We need your help. Elizabeta, can't you, well, set aside your dislike," ("More like pure hatred," Lovino snorted.) Kiku smiled hopefully, but his eyes showed weariness, "for Gilbert-kun?"

Lili and Katyusha also approached the duo, nodding enthusiastically. Katyusha placed a hand on Elizabeta's arm, sending her a calming look. "Please, this is necessary..."

"We always help those in need," Lili said firmly, her green eyes full of determination, "you said that yourself, Elizabeta. You and Kiku made this club, and you have to stick by it."

As the few in the room aw-ed at the sight, Lovino scoffed. He leaned back in his seat between Luciano and Feliciano, arms crossed. "What's with this crap? This is just a Yaoi Fanclub." Seriously, what was with the feelings and staying positive and helping others? Sure, Lovino had agreed to help out, and when Feliciano had found out, he joined right away. Something about how adorable Matteo and Gilbert were together. And how he'd make the two feed gelato to each other. _I hope that potato bastard isn't making Feli feed him gelato..._

"Ve, Fratello, don't you see how strong they all are together? Teamwork!" Feliciano cheerfully pumped a fist, wiping his eyes from their tears at the scene displayed before him with his left hand.

Luciano nodded from his spot, also taking out his own handkerchief and rubbing at his eyes. "It's so inspiring, cugini," He commented.

"Ugh, enough with this fucking crap!" Lovino groaned loudly, slamming his head against the wooden chair. "I've had enough of this shit, dammit. I'm already thinking of quitting." And as Feliciano and Luciano gasped, Lovino really knew he wouldn't quit. Because then that tomato jerk would probably become sad, which would make Lovino feel pretty damn guilty. Lovino didn't want the tomato bastard to be sad. He loved that creepy tomato jerk.

"Questo gruppo è di aiutare gli altri a trovare il vero amore, cugino Romano!"

"_This group is about helping others find true love, cousin Romano!_"

"Fratello, come lei non può vedere l'amore che abbiamo per connettersi? Dobbiamo ottenere insieme Roderich e —"

"_Brother, how can you not see the love we have to connect? We have to get together Roderich and —_"

"Feliciano, cazzo di essere tranquillo," Lovino hissed out, "he knows Italian!"

Feliciano glanced at a certain Swiss, cough, who was full on glaring at them. "Ah ha ha, ve, please don't kill me, _please don't_!" Feliciano pleaded immediately, clasping his hands together. "I — I have relatives in Ticino!" Lovino rolled his eyes as Luciano stifled a chuckle.

"CAN WE GET BACK ON THE STUPID TOPIC FOR THIS MEETING?"

Everyone turned to the loud voice, which was surprisingly, and somehow also not surprisingly — Natalya. The Belarusian girl had roughly slammed her hands on the table before her, her "you're all dead if you don't give me my brother" look on her face. Oh, that look was really familiar. Katyusha walked back toward her sister, attempting to calm the yandere (which Kiku had dubbed her as) girl down.

"Natalya, please..."

"I'll burn you alive, сястра —"

"Ah, I shall take over this discussion from Kiku!" Francis declared triumphantly, standing atop Roderich's dining table. The Austrian winced at the sight, before bargaining which was worse: having the Frenchman standing on the table or on his beloved, precious piano. Both were terrifying. "You see —"

"Get off the table, bastard!"

"You're dirtying it!"

"Shave your stubble, you look creepy!"

Francis sniffled dramatically, stepping down from the table (Roderich let out a breathe of relief). He gracefully took a seat, relaxing for a moment. "You see, Gilbert is in denial and so is Matthieu." Francis explained. "Gilbert won't admit he has feelings for Matthieu, and Matthieu doesn't realise that he loves Gilbert."

"So, all in all, we have to make Matthew realise he likes Gilbert." Mei deadpanned. "How very cliché."

Lovino snorted. "Yeah, definitely. Why couldn't the fucking stupid authoress find a different, _original_ plot —"

"Fratello, _Fourth Wall_," Feliciano stressed worriedly, pressing an index finger to his mouth to shush him.

"Shit. Sorry."

Kiku sighed. Perhaps he should've just ditched all of this and respond to Arthur's pleading messages and emails. "I'll make the plan." Elizabeta offered, surprising everyone. "We have to help them, don't we?" She smiled brightly, and Feliciano sniffled. He jumped to his old friend, hugging her.

"Group hug, ve, group hu_gggg_!"

* * *

><p><strong>Team Alfred<strong>: 3  
><strong>Team Gilbert<strong>: 17 — _gained 12_

_Pfft, TG's kicking ass.  
><em>

* * *

><p><strong>Alfred F. Jones<strong> and **Matthew Williams** are in a relationship.  
>[<strong>Tino Väinämöinen<strong>, **Alfred F. Jones**, _and_ **two** _others like this_]

**Francis Bonnefoy** Poor Matthieu!  
>[<strong>Antonio Fernández Carriedo<strong>, **Lovino Vargas**, _and_ **five** _others like this_]

**Alfred F. Jones** wat's that suposed 2 mean? DD:

**Lovino Vargas** exactly what's he's implying, culo  
>[<strong>Antonio Fernández Carriedo<strong>, **Ivan Braginski**, _and_ **seven** _others like this_]

**Matthew Williams** You don't approve of our relationship, Francis...?

**Arthur Kirkland** Ignore them, Matthew. They're simply jealous.

**Antonio Fernández Carriedo** Are you insinuating that my sweet Lovi and my best pal Francis of being jealous of that stupid American and... what's the other guy's name? Mm, you should watch what you say, Kirkland.  
>[<strong>Feliciano Vargas<strong> _likes this_]

**Lovino Vargas** ...antonio...  
>[<strong>Antonio Fernández Carriedo<strong> _likes this_]

**Antonio Fernández Carriedo** lovi~ i miss you :D come back to me soon, sí?

**Kiku Honda** Ah... (-_-;)

**Arthur Kirkland** You've joined up with the Frog, haven't you?

**Alfred F. Jones** hm? wazzup/?

**Kiku Honda** ...It's none of your business, Arthur-san.  
>[<strong>Francis Bonnefoy<strong>, **Antonio Fernández Carriedo**, _and_ **Yao Wang** _like this_]

**Arthur Kirkland** Tch, Kiku... It is my business when it concerns you. Especially since you're around the Frog and you know what the Frog wants.

**Kiku Honda **I appreciate your words, Arthur-san. However, it is none of your concern as of right now.  
>[<strong>Lovino Vargas<strong>, **Yao Wang**, _and _**Leon Wang **_like this_]

**Alfred F. Jones** what're u talking bout?

**Arthur Kirkland** Stay out of this, Alfred.

**Kiku Honda** Please stay out of this, Alfred-san.  
>[<strong>Ivan Braginski <strong>_likes this_]

**Alfred F. Jones** WHAT? I should know since I'm the hero!  
>[<strong>Peter Kirkland <strong>_likes this_]

**Arthur Kirkland** ...! You're using proper English.

**Peter Kirkland **Dun dun dun.

**Alfred F. Jones** hahaha ya mean proper American

**Arthur Kirkland** I didn't mean that at all!

**Peter Kirkland** you mean proper Sealandic  
>[<strong>Peter Kirkland<strong>, **Luciano Vargas**, _and_ **Raivis Galante **_like this_]

**Alfred F. Jones** what bout proper American and Sealandic

**Arthur Kirkland** You're just trying to piss me off...

**Lovino Vargas** I think everyone enjoys pissing you off :D  
>[<strong>Antonio Fernández Carriedo<strong>, **Feliciano Vargas**, _and_ **twelve** _others like this_]

**Feliks** **Łukasiewicz** Like, I don't know what that one guy sees in Alfred. I mean, he totally lacks sense and style. I can, like, name men way better than him. Liet is totally one of them.  
>[<strong>Francis Bonnefoy<strong>, **Lovino Vargas**, **Vash Zwingli**, _and_ **forty-eight** _others like this_]

**Alfred F. Jones** hey!

**Feliks Łukasiewicz** Actually, I don't know what you see in...Matthew, too. Yeah, like, I've seen him around outside of school, and all he wears is like, jackets with maple leaves. Like, lame. Right, Liet?  
>[<strong>Toris Laurinaitis<strong> _likes this_]

**Matthew Williams** What...?

**Feliciano Vargas** Oooh, bashing! how exciting, ve  
>[<strong>Feliks Łukasiewicz<strong> _likes this_]

**Elizabeta Héderváry** When did you start liking bashing, Feli?

**Feliciano Vargas** Fratello showed me how great bashing is!

**Elizabeta Héderváry** Oh, really now? Lovino?

**Lovino Vargas** Che palle.  
>[<strong>Antonio Fernández Carriedo <strong>_and _**Feliciano Vargas** _like this_]

**Feliciano Vargas** So how's the plan going, Elizabeta?

**Elizabeta Héderváry** Very well, honestly. We just need to do some undercover work, so I'll have to use a few people...  
>[<strong>Francis Bonnefoy<strong>, **Kiku Honda**, _and_ **fifteen** _others like this_]

**Alfred F. Jones** a plan? is it a plan to save the world? :DDDDD  
>[<strong>Peter Kirkland <strong>_likes this_]

**Feliciano Vargas** stay out of it, ve. :)  
>[<strong>Feliks Łukasiewicz<strong>, **Antonio Fernández Carriedo**, _and _**Francis Bonnefoy **_like this_]

**Lovino Vargas** I'm proud of you, Feli  
>[<strong>Antonio Fernández Carriedo<strong> _likes this_]

**Alfred F. Jones** y doesn;t any1 tell me anythin/ DDDDDX

**Lovino Vargas** 'Cause you suck.  
>[<strong>Antonio Fernández Carriedo <strong>_and _**Ivan Braginski** _like this_]

**Alfred F. Jones **it's a hate on the awesomest and bestest hero in the entire world day, isn't it. y didn't u tell me, Artie?

**Gilbert Beilschmidt **permission to say dummkopf?  
>[<strong>Vash Zwingli<strong>, **Antonio Fernández Carriedo**, _and_ **ninety-eight** _others like this_]

**Gupta Muhammad Hassan **Permission granted.  
>[<strong>Sadık Adnan<strong>, **Heracles Karpusi**, _and_ **ninety-eight** _others like this_]

**Gilbert Beilschmidt **Dummkopf.  
>[<strong>Lovino Vargas<strong>, **Francis Bonnefoy**, _and_ **ninety-eight** _others like this_]

* * *

><p><em>AN:_

_Egypt-samaaaa. He's cool. Looks like TRNC, though. Huh, I wanna go to Egypt... Maybe Greece. I do love mythology, especially Egyptian and Greek mythology. Norse mythology is interesting as well.  
><em>

_Y'know, there's something I've always wondered. Where's the mansion in HetaOni? I mean, which _country_ is it in...? HetaHazard's set under America, RomaHeta's in an RPG world thing, and HetaQuest is in a different universe because of a book. Right? I haven't started HetaQuest, yet, though..._

_Erf. I was typing this, and I thought to myself, "WHO THE HELL ARE THE _**STRAIGHT**_ GUYS IN THIS STORY?" 'Cause I made Roddykins gay. Hm. _Maybe_ he's bisexual. Why no Swiss German, Swiss Italian, or Swiss French available translators? I'd put in Romansh since it's part of the four national languages of Switzerland, but there'd be nobody to translate it in the story..._

_Gah, guns. I was researching pistols, and got caught up in all the European firearms. Even when I chose the pistol I'd have Switzerland use, I still spent the better part of an hour researching firearms. I do like the SIG P220. People say it has really great accuracy and it's very reliable, but that the quality of SIG guns has diminished. Although, I prefer the Stg. 90, but I guess it's because I like assault rifles and the fact that — holy crap, I just babbled on about guns. _What the _hell._

_I hate writing horribly. It kills me to write Alfred's chats with such terrible spelling and what not. I do believe "cazzo di essere tranquillo" means... "fucking be quiet". I think. Ticino, or Tessin, in German, is one of the twenty-six cantons of Switzerland, and the language they speak there is Italian.  
><em>

_Anyway, thanks to all those who favourite, review, and alert. But honestly, I'd like to hear the opinions of those who favourited, but didn't give a review yet._**  
><strong>


	6. sé

**No More Peace**

© happy-synthesiser

**Hetalia **© Hidekaz Himaruya

* * *

><p><strong>chapter sé<br>**

* * *

><p><strong>Lovino Vargas<strong> is now single.  
>[<strong>Lovino Vargas<strong> _likes this_]

**Elizabeta Héderváry** WHAT? Is this some sick joke that you're playing on me?

**Matthew Williams** That's... shocking.

**Alfred F. Jones** whoaaa

**Lars Hendriks** huh.

**Feliciano Vargas** Fratello, you didnt have to change it so soon...

**Lovino Vargas** I don't care! I dont give a damn, and I don't care about that stupid fucking tomato bastardo!  
>[<strong>Lars Hendriks<strong> _likes this_]

**Francis Bonnefoy** Calm down, Lovino. Antonio isn't taking it well, either... He keeps crying and begging for his little tomato.  
>[<strong>Feliciano Vargas<strong> _likes this_]

**Gilbert Beilschmidt** LOVI? you dumped Toni? What the fuck happened?

**Lovino Vargas** I don't want to fucking talk about it, okay? Can everyone just leave me the fuck alone and go on with your shitty lives? Mind your own fucking business!  
>[<strong>Feliciano Vargas<strong> _likes this_]

**Alfred F. Jones** whoa, angry Italian dude, no need 2 say we have shitty lives. my life's pretty awesome :DD i bought some burgers, lost some w8, and, and i just found money on the street!  
>[<strong>Alfred F. Jones<strong> _likes this_]

**Arthur Kirkland** Thank you for your insensitivity, Alfred. Sorry to hear about the end of your relationship, Lovino and Antonio.  
>[<strong>Francis Bonnefoy<strong> _and_ **Alfred F. Jones** _likes this_]

**Alfred F. Jones** yer welcome! xD

**Arthur Kirkland** I was being — nevermind.

**Emma Hendriks** Gah, poor Antonio! Francis, where is he? Is he doing good? What happened? Should I go over and comfort him?

**Francis Bonnefoy** He's staying over at my place. He's...fine. I don't think Antonio wants anyone else, but, ah, Lovino.

**Gilbert Beilschmidt** I'm going to your house, Francis. I have to help out Toni

**Feliciano Vargas** ve...doesn't anyone care about my Fratello's feelings?  
>[<strong>Feliciano Vargas<strong> _and_ **Lovino Vargas** _like this_]

* * *

><p>It had been around three weeks since Lovino and Antonio had <strong>broken up<strong>, and while some people were still surprised, it was old news.

Antonio wasn't even over the heartbreak. The Spaniard rarely smiled, but he didn't cry at all. His eyes were constantly red, and he had dark circles under his usually, happy green eyes every single day. Gilbert and Francis were near his side every moment, always helping the nearly dead boy. It was like he couldn't even think without seeing Lovino.

Lovino wasn't doing any better. While he may have **broken up** with Antonio, he still looked like he would burst into tears at any moment. Of course, when anybody would ask about it, he would snap at them and go into a full out cursing spree in Italian. Feliciano constantly stood by his brother's side, but he also sometimes went to check on Antonio. Whenever anyone tried to ask Feliciano, the nicer Italian would start crying, so it was decided that the entire school would never find out the truth. The topic died down, but people made rumours in the beginning.

"They're still taking the **break up** pretty hard," Matthew murmured quietly, glancing at a quiet Antonio that wouldn't even touch the food Francis had offered to him, "I feel bad for him... For both of them, actually."

Arthur raised an eyebrow curiously. "Both? Why?"

"Well, it's obvious that Lovino still loves Antonio, and that Antonio obviously still loves Lovino." Matthew explained knowingly. "Lovino must have a good reason as to why he **broke up** with him."

Alfred frowned, before grinning. "Well, at least we're together!" He slung an arm over the Canadian, leaning toward him. Alfred pressed a kiss to the man's wavy hair, smile broad.

They'd been dating for around two weeks, and it'd been going very well. Alfred was happy, Matthew was happy, but... A frown made way on to Matthew's face. He hadn't spoken to Gilbert in three weeks. Even if Gilbert was always near him, because Antonio needed the other two members of the Bad Touch Trio, the Prussian didn't give him a second look, or as much as a "hello", or "Mattie, let's hang out." No. Just plain, flat out ignoring.

And it hurt.

"... Matt? Matthew? Matteo?" Alfred waved a hand in front of his boyfriend's face, eyes wide. Matthew blinked, before he smiled sheepishly, apologising. "We have to talk about our date —"

"You two are dating?"

Both turned to Lili Zwingli, who was sitting beside Arthur. She'd asked him for help with her work, and the Brit had agreed wholeheartedly. Lili was one of the sweetest and innocent girls in the entire school, so Arthur hadn't minded in the least bit. What he did mind, however, was the blonde male known as Vash Zwingli. Arthur was relieved that the Swiss hadn't joined her because he was too busy trying to hide from Roderich and Elizabeta.

Lili blushed embarrassedly at their staring, meekly lowering her gaze. "Sorry, I shouldn't be getting into your business ..."

"No, it's fine," Matthew responded kindly, violet eyes meeting her emerald ones, "Alfred and I are dating." He confirmed once again, nodding his head.

"Yep, and we're having our first date! It's going to be at the shopping mall around noon this Saturday," Alfred said cheerfully, grinning from ear to ear, "although, we could've just bought burgers and hang out at the park. But Artie hit me and said to choose a different idea. And he called me 'Barney'. Haha, Artie, I'm not a purple dinosaur."

"'Barmy,' not that purple American thing," Arthur corrected him with an eye roll, "your plan was mental. Matthew would break it off with you on the spot."

Lili smiled at the trio, before she gazed at her pocket watch. She frowned, gathering her items. "I'm afraid I have to go," Lili said apologetically, "Big Brother asked me to meet him in the courtyard." She beamed at Arthur, looking grateful. "Thank you for your help, Mr. Kirkland. I appreciate it."

"It was nothing, Zwingli. And you don't have to call me Mr. Kirkland, it makes me feel old —"

"But you are old," Alfred interjected, grinning wildly.

"— just like Jones' horrible hero complex. I'll see you around." Arthur waved to her as Alfred complained in the background. Lili sent back a smile as well, holding her bag tightly.

She stalked away, passing by the table where Antonio and Francis were occupying. Gilbert wasn't near the duo because he'd received a detention for declaring that his teacher was unawesome and that he was way awesomer than any of them. The blonde girl gently tapped Francis's back two times with her finger, and he immediately straightened. Good. She'd done better than he'd anticipated. Then again, Lili could act sweet and get her way.

"Antonio," Francis lifted up the Spaniard's tanned chin, meeting his green eyes, "let's go get some fresh air. I feel like something was _accomplished_." The Spaniard's eyes widened, before Francis saw a twitch of a smile playing on the man's lips. It was gone in an instant, replaced by the hopeless, distant look he had on his face for the last few weeks. Nobody payed them any attention, other than a smirking Belarusian and a smiling Ukrainian. Both of the girls nodded to each other, leaving in the opposite direction of Francis and Antonio.

The two Europeans reached their destination: an empty classroom that Francis had full access to, courtesy of a female teacher Francis had flirted with.

Francis unlocked the door, allowing the OOC — er, unusually unhappy and depressed Spaniard inside. Once Francis stepped inside himself and locked the door, Antonio laughed loudly. Francis chuckled along with the brown haired male, sliding into one of the nearby seats. Antonio hummed a little, before scratching at his eye. "As much as I want to help Gilbert, I can't stand wearing these cosmetics," Antonio admitted with a sigh, gesturing to the "dark circles" under his eyes, "I miss spending my time with my Lovi, too~."

Francis agreed, smudging the makeup on Antonio's face gently. "Don't worry about it, mon ami. It's all part of the plan, and you do get to see Lovino after school hours," Francis reminded him, "I must say, both of your acting is amazing. Have you thought of a career as an actor?"

"Nah, I don't know," Antonio replied happily, "I just want a future with my little Lovino in it. And my bull. Maybe I'll be a bullfighter! Can you picture it, Francy?"

Francis blinked. "Didn't you want to be one a few years back...?" He distinctly remembered Antonio as a bullfighter, and his bum was _whoaaa_. Antonio looked particularly ravishing.

"Hm, I think I did," Antonio thought cluelessly, "yeah, I did. Anyway, I'm hungry, Francis. I hate denying food. It's killing me." His stomach grumbled, and Antonio clutched it gently. "It's okay, amigo, I'll feed you soon enough," Antonio soothed it quietly. Francis offered him a bento box, full of pasta and tomatoes. Antonio's eyes lit up at the sight of the pasta and the tomatoes, recognising the smell and look of the food. "Lovi and Feli cooked this, didn't they?"

Francis nodded, twirling on a blonde strand of hair. "Yes. Now, Lili has the information ..." He smirked triumphantly, arms crossed. "Arthur has no idea how better it is for Matthieu and Gilbert to be together. We have strategists and very cunning people on our side. He was unwise to think we'd let Matthieu be with Alfred."

"Oh, right. That British bastard crushed my ships," Antonio frowned, glaring uncharacteristically, "in a contest. I spent hours, days, _months_ working on them, and he destroyed them all ..." Francis sweatdropped, watching as Antonio glared at the wall and devoured the Italian food. "Anyway," Antonio brightened up more, smiling, "are you sure Gilbert won't ...?"

"Definitely not." Francis denied easily, voice reassuring. "He will not fall in love with Lovino, he has Matthieu."

Antonio beamed happily, biting into a juicy tomato.

* * *

><p><em><strong>three weeks ago<strong>_

Elizabeta had gathered the entire group of people who wanted to insist in helping Plan Awesome and Maple, or PAM. There were seventeen people in total, herself included in this organisation to assist Gilbert and Matthew into becoming lovers. The Hungarian felt nervous. Even though many people continually complimented her on her smarts and strategies, her plans weren't entirely foolproof. And she kind of hated making the titles. Other than that, she knew that not all of the people in the group would be happy of her first plan.

It involved "heartbreak", acting, and jealousy. All in all, not so very pretty. But nothing involving Gilbert was pretty.

She took account of those who had arrived first to her house, which happened to be Roderich, Kiku, and Mei. Elizabeta greeted them warmly, leading them to her dining room. She'd set up enough chairs for her friends and fellow teammates, whilst she sat in the front, so they could listen to her plans.

Roderich placed a hand on Elizabeta's arm, stopping the girl from leaving the room. She stiffened at the touch as Roderich spoke. "You should wait here. I'll guide the others here," He offered kindly, pushing up his glasses.

"Thanks, Roderich," Elizabeta smiled gratefully, walking back to her seat and plopping into it. She glanced at Kiku and Mei, who sat on opposite sides beside her. Kiku had his eyes on the folder in front of her, undeniable curiosity playing on his face. Mei was busily texting, an angry look on her. One can only guess that it was either Yao or Yong Soo pestering her. Possibly Leon. "Curious, Kiku?"

The Japanese male became startled at her words, before giving a small smile. "Yes. I mean, you hardly dropped any hints of what your ideas are. Anyone would be curious."

After those two, most of the people poured into her dining room, until they were missing four important people. Specifically Antonio, Lovino, Feliciano, and Francis. They would play a key part in this plan, and she couldn't start explaining without them.

"Not fashionably late, again ..." She heard Kiku mutter under his breathe, glancing at the double doors.

Feliciano burst through, screeching apologies at Kiku and Elizabeta. The Italian collapsed beside Kiku, still blabbing apologies. "Ve, I'm sorry! Fratello and I woke up late, and Fratello was supposed to pick up Big Brother Francis and Big Brother Antonio, and _I'M SO SORRY_! PLEASE FORGIVE ME, EVERYONE! EVEN IF YOU ALL HATE ME, VE!" He look nearly at breaking point, salty tears threatening to slide down his reddened cheeks.

"Feliciano-kun, please calm down ..."

"Cugini, it's fine!"

"Did you bring pasta?"

Feliciano brightened at the mention of delicious pasta before he burst into tears from stress. His cheerful expression was replaced with a look of pure horror and disgust directed toward himself. Everyone glared at Peter, whose eyes widened. The blonde boy raised his small hands defensively, as if saying, "It's not my fault." Feliciano sobbed loudly, the tears tracking on his smooth skin. "VE, AND I DIDN'T GET TO MAKE OR EAT PASTA! Dio, Dio, I'm a horrible, _horrible_ person! I shouldn't even be Italian! I could just die, ve, _I could just die_ —"

"Feliciano, calm down." Lovino loudly ordered in irritation, crossing his arms as he stalked into the room, Antonio, Francis, and Roderich behind him. "You're not a horrible person, and we will make pasta later." He promised, rolling his eyes as he sent his brother a small smile.

The younger Italian sniffled quietly, gazing up at his Fratello. "R - Really, Fratello?" He asked hopefully, rubbing his nose gently.

"Really, Feliciano." Lovino assured him with a sigh, sitting down beside his little brother. Feliciano cheered happily, hugging his older brother excitedly. Antonio turned his head away, sporting a nosebleed. Too adorable, he thought dreamily. Francis smirked as he sat beside Antonio, hands clasped in front of him.

Elizabeta smiled at the scene before her before locking eyes with Lovino. "Lovino, please break up with Antonio."

"..."

"Uh ..."

"WHAT THE _FUCK_ DID YOU JUST SAY?"

"Elizabeta, have you recently hit your head...?" Antonio inquired innocently, standing up along with Lovino. He grasped Lovino's waist tightly, afraid of letting the Italian out of his arms. "Or am I suddenly delusional? Haha, I don't know ..."

The Hungarian girl sighed. She knew that this would be the reaction she would have received before she revealed her thoughts.. The group of people in front of her were gazing at her with ill-hidden shock, extremely surprised. "I... Okay, Lovino and Antonio, I don't really want you to break up," Elizabeta reassured them kindly, sincerity woven into her soothing voice, "I love both of you together. I root for you. I take pictures of both of you. I forced Antonio to ask you out until you said yes after the initial fifteen times he'd asked. I planned your first date. If anything, I want you both to get married. In fact, I'll plan your wedding!"

Lovino scowled at her, eyes narrowed in a lethal glare. She didn't flinch, however, since Lovino wasn't extremely scary. Or threatening. "Then why are you asking for me to dump Antonio?"

"Wait, why can't I be the one to dump Lovi?" Antonio waved a hand high up in the air, eyebrows scrunched together as he spoke. The entire table broke out into laughs at Antonio's words. The Spaniard pouted, confused by their actions. Even Lovino was chuckling. "What ...?"

Elizabeta shook her head. "It wouldn't be believable. You love Lovino too much to do something as heartless as that."

"I'M _NOT_ HEARTLESS, DAMMIT! I SWEAR TO GOD, I'M NOT SOME FUCKING —"

"Moving on — it's part of the plan." Elizabeta explained gently. They still looked bewildered. "I want to make Matthew jealous, because we all know very well that Gilbert is extremely jealous of Alfred."

Definitely an understatement. Gilbert had probably bought a Death Note online and the first name he probably wrote in it was Alfred Freedom Jones (although, Ivan Braginski being the first was even more possible). Or, he had purchased a Beelzenef doll and written Alfred Freedom Jones on the back and stabbed it with pins or ran it over with his car. Yes, it seemed sort of possible. Elizabeta reckoned it could/would have happened.

Francis snapped his fingers, blue eyes wide. "Yes," He murmured, "Gilbert is constantly saying how stupid Alfred looks. And that he is stupid." Francis smirked in Elizabeta's direction, flashing her his pearly whites. "This is magnifique, Elizabeta!"

"Yeah, yeah, it's a fucking brilliant plan," Lovino mocked angrily, "but what does that have to do with me and Antonio?"

"Everything," Elizabeta replied patiently, emitting a very calm aura, "I just need you to pretend to 'break-up'. Then, I'll get Lili to spy on Alfred and Matthew. We'll find out the next time they're having a date, and we'll, um, have Romano 'court' Gilbert."

"Why me?" Romano asked in irritation, hands on his hips. Seriously, he wasn't about to date a fucking potato bastard. A fucking potato bastard. It made him shiver. It gave him goosebumps; just thinking about even kissing Gilbert made him want to burn his lips off. What if he had wurst or potato before he kissed Lovino? Lovino could die from —

"I get it," Kiku spoke up from his spot, smiling at Elizabeta, "I think it's very well established that Gilbert is a homosexual. Now, moving on, there are ..." He counted off all the males in the room. "Nine males in the room, myself included. Let's rule out all the people not fit to try to 'court' Gilbert-kun. First, Francis. I doubt Gilbert would be the least bit interested in going on a date with his best friend, and Matthew-san will just believe they're spending time as friends. The same goes for Antonio-san. Also, Antonio-san and Gilbert-kun on a date just looks... strange.

"Vash-kun and Roderich-san. Vash would undoubtedly try to gun down Gilbert. Gilbert doesn't like Roderich. Two more ruled out. Luciano and Peter are too young for Gilbert and Matthew to consider seriously. Feliciano-kun doesn't like lying to Ludwig-kun and Ludwig would have forced Feliciano into telling the truth," Kiku reasoned thoughtfully, hand on his chin, "which would leave Lovino as the only possible prospect for this plan ..."

Lovino raised an eyebrow. "What about you?"

Kiki was taken off guard. "What about me ...?"

"Fucking —" Lovino snorted in annoyance, slapping a hand on his forehead. "You're also a candidate!"

"Oh," Kiku blinked in surprise, "well, I suppose I will have to 'date' Gilbert-kun, then, Elizabeta."

"No, you can't," Elizabeta interjected, destroying Lovino's recently thought up plans, "I need you for the first plan. In order to get Alfred away from Matthew on their date."

"Why me?" The Japanese male inquired, curious.

"Think about it." Elizabeta urged softly, nodding her head. "Who is the closest to Alfred out of all of us? Certainly not Francis," the blonde pouted, "you are, Kiku. You're one of his closest friends, so it has to work."

Kiku sighed at the mention of his closeness to the American. Yes, Alfred-san was his friend, and they did watch horror movies together, so it would make sense to use him. "I suppose." He agreed tentatively, nodding in agreement.

"Great!" Elizabeta beamed at the Asian, before she paused. "Although, Lovino, it could work... I could just have you 'date' Gilbert once, and then have Kiku do the rest, if there are any necessary. Any objections?"

_This is only the beginning ..._

Everyone shook their heads, because essentially, this was all for a cause. And even though Lovino was pretty pissed off that he had to 'break up' with Antonio, he wanted Antonio and Feli to happy. Gilbert was close to Antonio and Feli, so naturally, Lovino had to help out. Even if it meant going out with that bastard. He had wurst way too much, now that Lovino thought about it. Much too much wurst.

"Okay!" Elizabeta beamed exuberantly, almost identical to Feliciano's smiles. She looked relieved at their decisions, settling down in her own chair. "Now, Lili is the most probable person to spy on Arthur, Alfred, and Matthew. She's kind, sweet, and most people wouldn't think of refusing her any help." The blonde girl merely nodded. "And once we find out where and when Alfred and Matthew are making plans, it'll be easier on us.

"We'll separate Alfred from Matthew, using Kiku of course. Now, Kiku, what is the thing that scares you the most?" Elizabeta inquired, and all eyes were on the terribly polite male.

Kiku squirmed in his seat, because he was highly aware of what he feared the most. He mumbled under his breathe, a light, pink flush spreading across the top of his cheeks. Elizabeta craned to hear him, eyebrow raised. He beckoned for her to only listen as he revealed his fears. "Cock ..." Kiku sighed, and Elizabeta's eyes widened. He was afraid of male body parts? But Kiku couldn't possibly, he was a male, and part of the Yaoi — "... _roaches_. Cockroaches." He finished quietly, gazing down at the floor embarrassedly.

"O - Oh ..." Elizabeta groaned inwardly, feeling moronic for thinking that he was actually afraid of penises. She paused, thinking if it would be helpful... Yes, it would. "Okay, so we have Kiku beg Alfred for help, and, oh, make sure to use the word 'hero'," Elizabeta reminded him, "then, Matthew will wander around the shopping mall, and Lovino will be on a 'date' with Gilbert."

Lovino scowled, feeling the urge to fling a chair across the room. You know, that feeling. Loads of people feel that way. "How? How am I supposed to get Albino Potato Bastard to go on a 'date' with me?"

"'Albino Potato Bastard' ...?"

"... It kinda sounds nice."

"Paulette, how can you even say that?"

"Moving on — answer the damn question."

"This is exactly why you, Lovino Vargas, were the person perfect for the job." Elizabeta answered mysteriously, grinning madly. It was true, it couldn't have worked with anyone else available to her. "Because of your bossiness —"

"What?"

"— assertiveness —"

"_What_?"

"— and natural bitchiness —"

"_What _the_ fu_ —"

"— you'll be able to force Gilbert into a date with you!" Elizabeta revealed triumphantly. "You're a very pushy person, Lovino. You can force people into doing things." At Lovino's outrageous face, she added in hastily, "I meant it as a compliment, of course. You are bossy."

"Tch," He murmured in annoyance, "whatever." Lovino, however, gazed up at Antonio's face. The Spaniard just smiled at him, pressing a gentle kiss to Lovino's hair lovingly. "Antonio ..."

"Don't worry, Lovi," Antonio assured him warmly, nuzzling Lovino's neck, "I'm fine, my little tomato. I won't get jealous. Because I know Gilbert and I trust my Lovi."

The Italian flushed pink, gently pushing off Antonio. He eyed the other people surrounding him; they were amused by the scene in front of them. "L - Let's just continue, okay?" Lovino cleared his throat, slumping into his padded seat.

"Ve, Fratello and Toni, you need great acting skills, don't you?" Feliciano wondered aloud thoughtfully, tapping his digitus secundus on his chin gently. Everyone finally noticed that the Italian had his eyes wide open, revealing lovely brown orbs. "Hm ...?"

"He opened his eyes!"

"Wow, so pretty ..."

"What the fuck," Lovino growled out in disbelief, "his eyes are just _brown_."

"Yes, but they've never seen Feliciano-kun open his eyes," Kiku said amusedly, "I wonder why he opened them ..."

"Ve, why are you all so shocked ...?"

* * *

><p>Mathew fidgeted nervously, hands grasping at the hem of his shirt; bunching the fabric incessantly. Okay, so this date was freaking him out. He'd woken up around seven, spent several (three) hours trying to find the right outfit, then an hour and thirty minutes on topics to talk about during the date, and was currently fifteen minutes early. He was situated on a bench, looking over his outfit. Realising that he did wear many garments with maple leaves on them, Matthew attempted to change his style.<p>

It didn't help that Matthew was anxious about this. It was his first date, and he couldn't help but be nervous. What if he said something stupid, and Alfred dumped him? If only Gilbert was here, he would've calmed Matthew down rather quickly. "Lighten up," Gilbert would say to him encouragingly, "Mattie." And Gilbert would smile encouragingly at him, which would make Matthew laugh right back. Gilbert ... Gilbert just knew how to make Matthew feel better, and Matthew always felt right around his best friend.

_Ex-best friend_, Matthew thought bitterly, remembering the recent events. He stood up, sighing. _If only..._

"Yo, Matth_ewwww_!"

The Canadian was tackled by an overzealous Alfred, whose face was flushed from running. Matthew giggled as Alfred grinned at him, pressing a chaste kiss to Matthew's mouth. "Alfred," Matthew muttered happily, "you're early, too."

Alfred beamed at him, blue eyes wide with complete excitement. Sure, he'd woken up around ten, since Arthur had decided to take it upon himself to help Alfred try to be a good boy during his date. Alfred had jumped out of bed when Arthur mentioned his courtship with Matthew, and tackled the Briton to the floor. He'd assaulted Arthur (clad in his American flag boxer shorts) with his fluffy American flag-styled pillow, almost smothering the green-eyed male to death.

But Artie decided — since he had the role as the villain — he had to fight back. So, he kicked Alfred off him, cursing at him with words Alfred didn't even comprehend. Something like, "_twat_", "_cunt_", and "_tosser_". After Alfred decided to let his sidekick (when Alfred called him that, Arthur called him a "_plonker_" and told him that he was going to "_need to belt up or you're going to cock-up on the date_") help him, he got dressed. Then, Arthur criticised Alfred's outfit (particularly his heroic bomber jacket with the large fifty across the back) before shoving several different assortments of junk food (burgers, sweets, pizza, soda, other fattening food, etc.) into Alfred's hands as a reward for not being so idiotic. The American had thought he had hit jackpot, so he was sort of on a sugar high and obviously eccentric.

"Yeah!" The American exclaimed jubilantly, righting himself and Matthew. "So, how are you, my beautiful, fair maiden?"

Matthew blushed pink, rolling his violet coloured eyes. "I'm a man, Alfred." He reminded him, flicking Alfred's forehead. But it was flattering to hear Alfred him beautiful.

"Same thing," Alfred remarked uncaringly, waving a hand, "anyway, let us begin this heroic date!" Matthew could have chosen to deadpan at the so very Alfred outburst, but then the American would start pouting. So, Matthew just smiled at his boyfriend, beginning the "heroic" date.

The two hadn't noticed the trio a few steps behind them, snorting at the scene displayed before them. In all honesty, most people would snort at it.

"'Heroic' date," Paulette muttered quietly, face thoughtful, "lame."

Luciano nodded in agreement, hand encasing his chin. "Indeed. How 'bout I take you on a much better date?" He flashed her a flirty grin, to which she shot down in an instant. Damn. He usually flirted much better than Feliciano and Lovino.

"I'd rather date Francis," She said seriously, hands on her hips. Luciano and Peter froze at her words, because someone saying that they would rather date Francis rather then a sane, normal person — Hell must've frozen over. N - Next thing they knew, Natalya would fall in love with Feliciano. Oh, god, that would be pure Hell. Paulette sighed before smirking at their expressions. "I'm kidding."

Peter let out a breathe of relief, before nudging her. "So, you'd choose me over Luci, right?" He flashed her a grin, and she grimaced immediately.

"No." Paulette answered straight out, pulling out her mobile. She dialled the number of Elizabeta, waiting for the Hungarian to pick up. "Yeah, it's Paulette, Luciano, and Peter."

_"Oh! How is the spying going?"_

"Boring," Paulette replied blandly, stalking forward to keep up the few metre long distance with Matthew and Alfred, "but they're both here. I can't believe they don't notice us, though."

"Yep, they're really lame," Peter chimed in, rolling back and forth on the heel of his feet, "why'd you give us this job? Where are you, anyway?"

_"I'm helping Mei scare Kiku enough. I'll come over as soon as I can and relieve you of your duties. Just keep me updated."_

"Yes, ma'am," The three chorused in unison, saluting. They blinked. "Why are we saluting ...?"

"Hey, is Feliciano with you?" Luciano asked Elizabeta, taking the phone from Paulette's grasp. She frowned at him, annoyed. "Can you tell him that I want some pasta?"

_"Um. Sure, Luciano. Peter, do you know Roderich's little brother?"_

The big eyebrowed boy lit up at the mention of the violet eyed, artistic male. "Yeah! Is he with you?"

_"Well, he insisted on following Roderich to Kiku's house, and he keeps mentioning about how he would like to make everything more artistic. He wanted to make Feliciano's pasta artistic."_

"That's Alexander for you!" Peter laughed loudly, smiling.

Paulette jerked her phone back from the two, sending them a glare. She murmured a farewell to her mentor, placing her cell into her pockets. She froze as she saw Matthew turning around, hurriedly shoving Luciano and Peter into a bush before pretending to busy herself with her phone. Paulette glanced out of the corner of her eye, attempting to see if the Canadian had turned around already.

He hadn't, and he caught her eye. Matthew smiled at the girl, and she frowned in response. He appeared taken aback before Alfred moved his head forward. Letting out a sigh, Paulette gazed at Peter and Luciano, who were still in the bushes.

"That wasn't nice." Peter pouted childishly, fixing his blue cap and brushing off leaves from his outfit. "We could've _died_, Paulette!"

"Yes! That bush was terrifying! With it's... it's _horrifying_ sticks and leaves!" Luciano added in weakly, checking his designer clothes for tears. "The Grim Reaper was upon us!"

"Yes," Paulette snorted in derision, "did you two void your bladders in your briefs?"

Everyone passing by made sure to avoid the two gaping males. In fact, it was a highlight of gossip during the day in the mall. In fact, it would be a hot topic anywhere. Two young men, who couldn't control their bladders ... People would be quite curious.

"Did you hear? Those two boys, wet themselves! Such a shame, I thought men could hold their bladders these days ... I suppose bushes can be frightening, however."

"Oh, those poor children! I can only imagine the horror they went through ..."

Matthew blinked at the employee talking to a customer, speaking about two males so frightened that they decided to do what they once did when they were mere babies. "Alfred, those are some really strange topics ..." He mentioned to the American, who nodded.

"Yeah, I don't piss in my clothes!" He declared rather loudly, scaring off several children and an old couple in the process. "Er... I do?"

Matthew could only roll his eyes, feeling a bit amused. "I'm hungry," He admitted, and Alfred grinned, "but no burgers. Or fast food." Alfred pouted, poking Matthew's cheek gently.

"But where are supposed to eat, then?" Alfred groaned childishly. "I don't have a clue about any other restaurants. You want Chinese? Or do you want me to take you to some pancake place ...? Or a sushi place? Thai, maybe? Or Indian food? Spanish? I think there's a Swedish restaurant around here ..."

"Um, Alfred, slow down." Matthew laughed nervously, holding up his hands to calm down the blue eyed man. Alfred let out a breathe of air, merely sending him a small smile. "Don't worry, I guess we can settle for something, Alfred. Let's just walk around, 'kay?"

Alfred nodded like an obedient puppy. "Okay, Matt! Let us go onward, like amazing heroes do!"

"You could've left out the 'heroes' part," Matthew muttered.

"Hm?"

"Nothing."

So, the two went forward on their date. Until Matthew had to use the washroom, leaving Alfred to stand around uselessly.

Alfred hummed a song under his breathe, tapping his foot quietly. Matthew was really amazing. He took all the shenanigans that Alfred did in stride, and continually smiling at him. Alfred really liked him, especially the way Matthew always was shy. His cell rang, however, playing the American anthem.

"Yo!"

_"A - Alfred!"_

The American could only blink at the panicked voice of his Japanese friend, Kiku. He held the phone to his ear tighter, even more worried. The smaller man was always so calm and collected, but there could only be one thing that could scare the Japanese male so badly. "... Kiku, don't tell me ..." His voice trailed off.

_"Y - Yes!"_ Kiku exclaimed fearfully, _"cockroaches."_

If there was one thing Kiku hated (other than Ivan Braginski, of course) and abhorred the most in the world, it would have to be cockroaches. On several occasions, Kiku would cry from being near one of them. Alfred had seen this himself, when he'd burst through the Asian males house for visual novels and food, when Kiku was crying and Yao was triumphantly smashing the bug to its inevitable death with a rolled up newspaper.

"Whoa, bro, calm down," Alfred instructed Kiku, hearing the man sob from the other side. It was so strange to actually hear the soulless — er, aloof Asian male afraid of something. Especially something as pathetic as cockroaches, but Alfred was... kind of scared by American horror movies. Kind of. Th - They weren't all that frightening all the time.

_"A - Alfred,"_ Kiku choked out, _"please. Please come to my home, I'm much too scared to move. Yao and Yong Soo aren't available, and I - I ..."_

Alfred craned to hear what the Japanese male was saying. Kiku sighed. _"I - I need a hero to save me Alfred-san. Please ..."_ He said pleadingly, and Alfred knew he just had to. Kiku went immediately to Alfred when the American had called for help because of those horrific — er, lovely movies. Now, Alfred would have thought about it more if it weren't for the fact that Kiku said hero. Hero. Even if he was on a date with Matthew, he needed to help a friend, after all ...

"Don't worry, Kiku, I'm coming right over!"

_"Thank you, Alfred-san, thank you so much!"_

Alfred grinned as he ended the call. Kiku called him a hero. 'Kay, that felt pretty damn awesome since nobody really called him a hero. But he was a hero. He was the greatest hero ever. "Now, what to tell Matthew..." He mused quietly, because he was on a date. With Matthew. His boyfriend.

"Tell me what?" The violet-eyed boy asked from behind him, arriving back from the washroom. Matthew raised an eyebrow as Alfred smiled sheepishly, shoving his mobile back into his pockets.

"Well ..."

* * *

><p>Gilbert liked to think he had the grasp of things around him. He was awesome, and most people were marginally less amazing then him. Most people didn't recognise or appreciate his reign of awesomeoness however. They didn't even bother to look at his blog, which only his faithful followers bothered with. Which consisted of Juan and Kiku. He truly was grateful for their devoted service to his supreme awesomeness.<p>

So, when Lovino Vargas — that bitchy, but adorable Italian that resembled cute Feliciano greatly — burst through their front door, complained about the disgusting smell of potatoes and wurst, grabbed a half-naked Gilbert, attempted to drag him outside, and declared ten words that would inevitably scar him for life, Gilbert decided that perhaps he should never ever, _ever_ think his life would be normal (but it would be awesome).

Oh, yes. Those ten words? Here we go ... :

"You're going on a date with me, Albino Potato Bastardo!"

Gilbert gaped at Lovino, pulling away from his tight grip. Gilbert was still in his boxers, and he didn't want to date his best friend's ex-boyfriend, and Lovino wasn't exactly the cuddliest or very affectionate person. Going on a date with Feli? Yep, it'd be awesome, but West would probably starve him for a month. Going on a date with Lovino? No, no, and _no_.

"Lovi —"

"Don't fucking call me that."

"— why do you want to go on a date with me?" Gilbert asked frantically, because he sure as hell wasn't going on a date without eating wurst and without putting a shirt on. And with Lovino. "Even though it would obviously be awesome, what about Toni? I couldn't do that to him ..."

Lovino glowered at the mention of Antonio, choosing to glare at Gilbert. The albino stood his ground against the Italian until Lovino scowled and spoke. "We're going on a date, potato bastard, whether you like it or not," He hissed out, eyes narrowed.

"Uh ..."

"Lovino?" Ludwig's deep voice called out as he rubbed his blue eyes, wearing acceptable clothing. He'd just woken up, and he was definitely surprised that Lovino was assaulting his brother. "You're dating my brother?"

Gilbert shook his head wildly, gesturing heatedly to Lovino. "No way, West! He's Toni's! I don't know why, but he's making me go on a date with him!" He send a hopeful expression to his brother, hoping that Ludwig would scare off Lovino.

"Oi," Lovino drawled out, arms crossed beneath his chest, "if you even think of helping him out of this, potato bastard, I'll make sure that you never see Feli again. Ever. I'll take him away from here, and you'll never see my Fratello ever again. He'd also never smell like potatoes anymore ..." Lovino appeared thoughtful at this point, weighing out pros and cons. "Hm ..."

"Ah." Ludwig also weighed out the pros and cons of helping his brother, but Feliciano ... "Have fun on your date, Bruder."

The blonde proceeded to ditch his older brother.

"WHAT? WEST, _help me_! I'm your brother! What if he rapes me?"

"Like I'd _ever_ rape you, Albino Potato Bastardo."

* * *

><p><em>AN:_

_Haha, betcha didn't think that was going to happen. Lovi and Toni "breaking up", that is. I wouldn't break 'em up unless it involved that one special pairing I adore. The new chapter of Kuroshitsuji was amazing. Ciel was so badass, but the blonde kid really fucked up with him. Ah, revenge. So brilliant. I love Feli's eyes. They're the loveliest brown eyes I've ever seen. :D  
><em>

_Ah. Yes. I apologise if I didn't reply to any of your reviews or PMs, I'm such a lazy bastard. And I've been kinda busy and all that stuff. I also apologise if the Facebook chats don't seem right, I don't really use that site. I have an account, I just check it bimonthly.  
><em>

_Hm, I looked up "crackiest pairing in Hetalia" and someone mentioned China/Latvia ... It's so possible. Can you even imagine Italy/Belarus? Whoa. Oh, I've seen England/Austria in this one crack!fic.  
><em>

_Now, what are some of the crackiest Hetalia pairings you've come across?_

_- hs  
><em>


	7. syv  jealousy

_No More Peace_

* * *

><p><strong>chapter syv<strong>

**jealousy  
><strong>

"_Jealousy is not at all low, but it catches us humbled and bowed down, at first sight._"  
>— Sidonie Gabrielle Colette<p>

* * *

><p>"..."<p>

"..."

"Nice weather, huh?"

"Shut up."

"No need to be mean, Lovi, I was just trying to make awesome conversation. It's just so awkward. And not the awesome kind of awkward, lemme tell you that."

"Don't call me that, bastard," Lovino snarled angrily, hands on his hips. 'Lovi this, Lovi that' ... Only Feli and Antonio were allowed to call him by the nickname Lovi. Maybe Emma. But a potato bastard calling him Lovi? Oh hell no. He'd be damned if that idiot called him that nickname.

Gilbert rolled his red eyes in response. "Not like you could or would do anything about it." So very true.

"Sh - Shut up! I could kick your sorry ass, but I might hurt you so badly that you would end up needing medical treatment for your severe wounds!" Lovino sputtered out in indignation, tanned face turning a lovely red shade of tomato. "It's so true, you bastard. But I'm way too fucking nice to get into a fight with you."

Gilbert paused, gazing up at the building before him. Lovino raised an eyebrow as he also stopped walking, waiting for the bastard to move. "Lovino, why are we here? At this mall? What about Toni? And his bull? What if he castrates me? I want to keep my vital regions safe; the entirely awesome five metres of it!" He blurted out anxiously, glancing around for a brown mop of hair, baby bull, and probably the large, polished battle axe Antonio kept on a stand in his room. The Spaniard swore he'd never use the family heirloom weapon unless it was against that British bastard, but Gilbert couldn't take the chance. Oh, if only Gilbird was there, but the yellow birdie was off flying around, hanging around other unawesome birds. Gilbert should have been a priority over those judging birds that were less than half as awesome as Gilbird and Gilbert.

_Don't kill Gilbert, don't kill Gilbert._ Lovino let out a deep breathe as mini Angel!Lovino and mini Devil!Lovino appeared on his shoulders. "_Kill Gilbert_," Devil!Lovino hissed out temptingly, red tail wagging excitedly, "_nobody would have to know about it. Potato Bastard #2 would be out of the way ..._"

"Really ...? Hm ... Sounds damn awesome, Devil!Lovino."

Angel!Lovino glared at the shit-eating grin Devil!Lovino was wearing, before turning to the Normal!Lovino hopefully. "_No, Lovino! Out of the goodness of your heart, please do not kill Gilbert! Have pity on that poor, moronic man!_" He begged kindly, hands clasped in front of him.

Lovino gazed blankly at mini Angel!Lovino, who smiled soothingly. He put up a hand... and swatted away at Angel!Lovino. Devil!Lovino cackled, rubbing his hands evilly. "_Good, good_," Devil!Lovino laughed triumphantly as Lovino smirked along with him, also rubbing his hands evilly. Both were interrupted by the buzz of Lovino's cell. He groaned, pulling it out reluctantly.

**Sender**: elizabeta  
><strong>Recipient<strong>: lovinotomatoes  
>Don't kill Gilbert :P that's my job.<p>

_Dammit._

_Guess I won't have to kill him,_ Lovino thought begrudgingly, eying Devil!Lovino apologetically. Devil!Lovino screeched out, "_Curse that yaoi fangirl and her omniscient ways_," before falling to his knees and fading to red dust.

"Okay, bastard, let's get one thing straight." Lovino glared at him, hands on his hips. He met Gilbert's red eyed gaze, hazel eyes hardened. "I am not dating Fernández Carriedo," He struggled to get those words past his mouth, "we are at this mall because we ..." Lovino threw away the urge to vomit, because it was really much more revolting and less easier to get those words out of his mouth than to think them, "we are on a date. And I doubt that Fernández Carriedo would castrate you. And his bull isn't even completely grown. It's still a baby."

"... 'Fernandez Carriedo'?" Gilbert mused quietly, shaking his head. "I'm not sure about this. That bull practically _worships_ Toni; it probably has a shrine hidden for its master —"

"Shut up for once!" Lovino grouched out, shoving the Prussian lightly. So damn annoying ... "We're here, so shut your mouth and quit whining." He then proceeded to drag the Prussian inside the building, not caring if Gilbert had stumbled a few times. Or tripped. "Finally."

Gilbert reluctantly walked beside the grumpy Italian, hands shoved into his awesome pockets. Lovino rolled his eyes at Gilbert, grasping his cell and texting several people. Elizabeta, and that one young girl, Paulette, that Luciano swore he'd win over. Tough luck, Lovino snorted, that girl always shot him down. She even shot Feli down, and even though Feli was extremely gay and shat out sparkling rainbows, most girls couldn't refuse his natural, overwhelming cuteness.

**Sender**: lovino-tomatoes  
><strong>Recipient<strong>: Elizabeta-fujoshi; Paulette  
>We're here. now what?<p>

**Sender**: Elizabeta-fujoshi  
><strong>Recipient<strong>: lovino-tomatoes  
>That's fantastic. Paulette knows what to do.<p>

Lovino sighed.

**Sender**: Paulette  
><strong>Recipient<strong>: lovino-tomatoes  
>First of all, Luciano says he would like some pasta. Second, just wait for a few minutes. Matthew and Alfred appear as if they're arguing. Avoid the food court, Vargas.<p>

**Sender**: lovino-tomatoes  
><strong>Recipient<strong>: Paulette  
>whatever. Tell luci to screw off.<p>

**Sender**: Paulette  
><strong>Recipient<strong>: lovino-tomatoes  
>I think he's crying now.<p>

**Sender**: lovino-tomatoes  
><strong>Recipient<strong>: Paulette  
>Good. :D<p>

"So, _Lovi_," Gilbert stressed the last word, grinning as Lovino deftly chucked a balled up piece of paper at him. "what do we do now?"

Lovino shrugged, arms crossed under his chest. He boredly glanced around, eying all the loud chatter and a couple nearby. The boyfriend was carrying his girlfriend's shopping bags, looking completely exhausted, but he smiled at his girlfriend warmly. She smiled back just as kindly, pressing a gentle kiss to his cheek, giggling into his skin. Lovino frowned, mind flashing.

_Antonio ..._

"You miss Toni, don't you?" Gilbert inquired thoughtfully, focused on the smaller man and his gaze toward the two lovers. Lovino snorted inwardly, because he couldn't really miss Toni. They weren't truly broken up, but he'd missed the Spaniard fawning over him and giving him surprise kisses that made his face flush in embarrassment. Of course, he had seen Antonio outside of their school, but most people went to check on Antonio. Especially the ones not included in... PAM (Plan Awesome and Maple). So, it meant less time for Lovino and Antonio to be around each other.

So, he kind of missed that bastard. Kind of.

"Maybe," Lovino murmured under his breathe, ducking his head slightly. He cleared his throat, scowling to the side. "It doesn't matter."

"'Doesn't matter?'" Gilbert repeated in disbelief, standing in front of the Italian with a frown. He grasped Lovino's shoulders tightly, but not enough to bruise or hurt the smaller man. "You _broke_ his fucking heart!"

"What do you know about love?" Lovino lashed out, already extremely annoyed with his 'date'. He had to deal with other fuckers interrogating and annoying the shit out of him about his supposed "break up," and he really wasn't in the mood for someone else lecturing him. '_Oh, Antonio still really loves you, but I don't know what he sees_,' or '_You're a fucking asshole, breaking his heart_' was always said — dammit, he really _fucking loved_ Antonio, and he didn't do anything fucking wrong. "You fucking idiot! You won't even admit that you fucking love that —"

**Shit**_shitshitshit_ — Lovino stopped himself, because anything else he would say would ruin everything. Gilbert would get enraged and leave when everything was already so perfect and going smoothly. Stupid bastard was already in denial, and anything that brought up Matteo would scare him off like a little baby.

"... What?" Gilbert raised an eyebrow, releasing Lovino in surprise.. "What'd you say, Lovi?"

"N - Nothing," Lovino supplied immediately, hazel eyes glued to the ground, "Gilbert, I didn't come here with you to be lectured. Can we just fucking hang out without you hassling me?"

He turned his gaze upward, pleadingly, and Gilbert could see the Feliciano in him. Oh god not that. The puppy eyes. Feliciano always used those adorable bastards, and no matter how awesome Gilbert was, he couldn't refuse a Vargas' powerful puppy eyes. Roma, their grandfather, Luciano, their cousin, and themselves, Lovino and Feliciano, had that freakishly adorable trait with those god given eyes.

_Manipulative eyes_, Gilbert groaned, _I wish I had those awesome things._

"Fine."

* * *

><p>"You see, Mattie ..."<p>

"What?"

Alfred rubbed the nape of his neck awkwardly, glancing to Matthew's violet eyes and then to the ground. Matthew took a step forward, gently pulling up Alfred's chin. The American coughed as he pulled off the other man's warm hand. "I kind of have to help Kiku." He admitted anxiously, wringing his hands. Oh god, this wasn't heroic at all.

The thought of helping Kiku seemed to right in his mind. Just spit out the words, apologise, kiss Mattie, and then run away heroically. It seemed like a great plan. However, Alfred felt uneasy with Matthew's eyes on him, internally debating whether it was a good idea to just leave Matthew or help Kiku. Both people were very important to Alfred.

"'Kind of?'"

"Well, I need to," Alfred insisted with a small smile, "Mattie, you have to know that my friends matter as much as you do."

Matthew blinked. He'd be lying if he said that he didn't feel hurt by the fact that Alfred was going to ditch him during their date. Especially their first date. He frowned. "I get that friends matter ... But this is our _first_ date, Alfred," Matthew said softly, feeling betrayed, "it hurts that I'm less of a priority than Kiku ..."

"I'm sorry," Alfred immediately answered, placing a gloved hand on Matthew's cheek, "but you'd do the same heroic act, wouldn't you? I mean, you'd leave if Gilbert was in trouble, right? Y'know, bros before hos?"

Okay. Matthew was fine with the first two sentences. If Gilbert needed his help, he'd obviously help him. Ah, but that last sentence ...

"I'm a whore?" Matthew took offence immediately, pulling back from Alfred's hand. The American frantically waved his hands, blue eyes wide. "Alfred, even if Gilbert needed my help, I certainly wouldn't have ditched you during our first date! I'd have taken you along!" Matthew exclaimed angrily, cutting off whatever Alfred was going to say. "I can't believe this — I can't believe you, Alfred!"

Ignoring the curious stares of other nosy people, Matthew fled in the opposite direction, leaving Alfred to slam his head into the wall.

(Knowing Alfred's amazing strength, he probably did break the wall.)

Alfred sighed wearily as his cell vibrated.

**Sender**: arthur;D  
><strong>Recipient<strong>: alfiethehero  
>You cocked up on the date, didn't you.<p>

"_Fuck you, Artie_!"

Paulette snorted as she eyed Matthew with his head ducked and Alfred in the distance, repeatedly slapping his head. Well, things seemed right on time. She leaned back on the bench, legs crossed as she saw Matthew collapse on to a bench in front of her, his violet eyes almost brimming with tears. Luciano and Peter were beside her, eating sweets they'd bought earlier with her money. _Why_ she hung around these morons was a very intriguing question.

Luciano nudged Paulette, smiling as he winked at her. "Y'know, I wouldn't ditch you on our first date. I'd make it the best day of your life, Principessa."

"No."

"Paulette —"

"No. We've gone over this. Do you want to have Richmond and Jett try to run you over with his Rolls-Royce again?" **[1]**

"But ..."

She ignored Luciano's whining and the brewing argument between him and Peter, gazing around for the two that needed to make their entrance. Paulette glanced at Matthew, who had settled into the bench seat, frowning as he flared at his lap. Interesting.

"Stupid Alfred," Matthew murmured under his breathe, "can't believe him ..." He grasped his mobile tightly in his grip, contemplating if he should call Gilbert. No, Gilbert would definitely tell him, "I awesomely told you so," or not even bother to answer the call at all.

Call Gilbert? Or not? Matthew wondered quietly, before he heard a familiar voice screeching and bitching, followed by raucous laughter.

"Oi, bastard, you smeared the chocolate all over my cheek!"

_Lovino ...?_

_With who? Antonio — no, it's ..._

Matthew's eyes widened.

"Gilbert ..." He breathed out softly, eying his smirking best friend, who was currently besting the frowning Lovino with a chocolate bar in hand. Apparently, the red eyed male heard him, because he glanced into Matthew's violet eyes.

"M - Mattie?" Gilbert stuttered out, taking a step back.

_What? WHAT?_ Matthew was still reeling and processing the scene in front of him. _Gilbert and Lovino? What is this? Two friends hanging out? What about Antonio? Oh, right, Lovino broke things off with him ... But these two together ... No, it couldn't be a ..._

Dread filled Matthew as he thought the last word.

"We're on a date," Lovino explained with a small smirk, "why the hell are you all alone, Matteo?"

_A date ...?_

Matthew felt his chest hurt, gazing at the couple in front of him. Why, though? He had Alfred, although he wasn't too sure about that. Especially with ditching him and all that other chizz. Just seeing the both of them, laughing and being so close with each other ...

_Jealousy_? A voice eerily whispered in his mind.

"No, no ..." Matthew muttered out in shock, violet eyes wide. Gilbert, his first friend, his best friend. Both of them always helped each other out. Hanging out. Getting into pointless arguments. Memories resurfaced.

_"Hey — Mattie, are you crying?"_

_Nine year old Matthew didn't bother to answer; he just continually rubbed at his puffy eyes. Gilbert's face softened as he glanced at the younger male, gently ruffling Matthew's golden locks. He pulled Matthew into a warm embrace, and Matthew immediately felt warm and safe._

_"Don't worry about the jerks that ignore you, or the ones that bully you," Gilbert grinned as Matthew buried his face into his shoulder, "because you're much more awesomer then them, Mattie. And I'll _always_ notice you."_

_"P - Promise?"  
><em>

_"It'd be very unawesome of me if I didn't." That made Matthew laugh, as Gilbert smirked.  
><em>

_Gilbert complimenting him on his pancakes ..._

_Gilbert constantly preaching about how awesome he was to him ..._

_Gilbert always trying to get him noticed ..._

_Gilbert nurturing the baby bird he'd found half-dead in an alley, with such care that Matthew sometimes saw ..._

_Gilbert and him having those play fights ..._

_Actual fights ..._

_Ending with Gilbert apologising at his front door and making him pancakes and buying him maple syrup as an apology.  
><em>

**Always**.

_With that awesome smile on his face._

It was something Matthew could never forget about Gilbert. He liked Gilbert's obnoxiousness; it was what made Gilbert the awesome person he was. Alfred was almost the same, but Matthew thought better of Gilbert. Alfred seemed so amazing in his eyes, so spontaneous. Gilbert was _very_ amazing in his own way.

Gilbert was ...

"R - Really now ..." Matthew murmured quietly, easing his grip on his cell. "Oh, I was just wandering around." He attempted a small smile, shyly gazing at Lovino's face. His heart clenched again as he thought of the two of them together — laughing and smiling with each other. Gilbert and Lovino. He shouldn't have felt so mad at the Italian though, because Gilbert _wasn't_ his.

He wasn't. Alfred _was_.

_But ..._

"So, uh, Mattie ..."

Matthew's heart skipped a beat.

__I think I might ...__

"I know we haven't talked in a while, but ... you've been crying, haven't you." Gilbert spoke to the blonde, taking a seat beside him. His sentence wasn't a question, but a statement. Gilbert ruffled Matthew's locks (_like he always did_), pulled him into a hug (_like he always did_), and grinned (_like he always did_). Matthew embraced him tightly, reminded of all those times when Gilbert was there for him. "Ah, Mattie, I missed your pancakes," Gilbert admitted, "I've been having crappy ones that Ludwig makes. They're not as awesome as yours."

Matthew smiled.

It was too bad that Matthew reluctantly, but firmly, shoved away those feelings for Gilbert.

_**No.** I can't._

* * *

><p>"Is he really afraid of them?"<p>

Elizabeta and Katyusha were standing in front of Kiku's humble abode, Elizabeta clutching a jar with a small _Blattella germanica _encased inside. The German cockroach was something Elizabeta had borrowed from a friend, but she didn't quite mind dealing with the insect. Obviously, that wasn't the same case with Kiku. "Yes," Elizabeta nodded with a small smile, glancing inside the glass, "it came as a surprise. Of all things, a cockroach."

"I'm not that fond of them, either," Katyusha admitted shyly, nervously gazing at the bug, "the way they look ..."

Elizabeta shrugged her shoulders, knocking on Kiku's front door. The Japanese male greeted them right away, blue yukata covered by a violet robe. He allowed them in, bowing. "Yao-san, Yong Soo-san, and Leon-san aren't here. Mei will arrive soon." Kiku informed them, letting them take seat. "So, when should I call Alfred-san?"

"Soon," Elizabeta assured him, "as soon as Roderich arrives."

"Roderich-san?" Kiku raised his eyebrows. "I wasn't aware he was coming. I was aware that it was only Feliciano-kun arriving ..."

Elizabeta smiled sheepishly, still hiding the jar in her bag. "Yes ... About that ... Francis and Antonio insisted on coming. I'm sorry."

"How are you all supposed to hide?" Mei wondered from the staircase, brown hair in a tight bun. A strand of curly hair was left to dangle around, and her hair still had those pink flowers pinned to it. She greeted Elizabeta and Katyusha warmly, as Kiku went to greet all the other guests. "You brought it, right?" Mei inquired quietly, eyes darting to the hallway to see if Kiku was still there. He wasn't.

Katyusha nodded, glancing at Elizabeta's bag. The Hungarian held it out for Mei to see, and the Asian girl took it without hesitation. She poked the glass, before proceeding to shake it vigorously. "M - Mei!" Katyusha gasped out, taking the object from her grasp. "You shouldn't do that to it ..." Katyusha scolded her with a motherly-like tone, holding the jar still. Before Mei could speak, Elizabeta took the item. Kiku and the others had arrived, so she hid the bug hastily.

"Art! This house, with its oriental beauty, is art!"

_Er, what?_

"Alexander, calm down," Roderich chastised the white-haired child beside him, "I even brought you along. You promised to behave."

"Sorry, Brother."

_Brother? _

Even Elizabeta was taken aback. Roderich had brown hair. Alexander had white, long hair in two separate braids. There was zero resemblance between the two; other than the violet eyes, ahoges, and large moles.

"Ah, Roderich, your little brother is very adorable!" Katyusha gushed out, smiling at the boy warmly.

Alexander blinked.

"Her breasts are art."

"..."

"I've found an apprentice!" Francis cried out joyfully, smiling proudly at a very mesmerised Alexander.

Antonio just laughed.

* * *

><p><em>AN: **CRAPPY UPDATE**, I know. 'Twas quite the half-assed chapter. I went from 6k last chapter to 3k. I thought of continuing it, but I shrugged and started thinking of saving up money to buy Korean things. Anyway, **no more disclaimers **from here on. I obviously don't own Hetalia. I do own this plot and the words. But everything else. _Hell no_.  
><em>

_And, I **promise** that I'll do better next chapter. I dunno, expect 5-6 thousand words. Maybe. Probably. 80% chance. Oya, and I took off the image cover thing. I think I'll find another ...  
><em>

**[1] **_Anyway. Hutt River is Richmond, dude owns a Rolls-Royce. Australia is Jett.__  
><em>

_I feel like I'm constantly bashing on America. Ah, oh well. And this chapter feels so OOC ('specially Mattiekins) that I want to curl up in the fetal position and cry. Urgh. This story is supposed to revolve around Mattie and his sappy drama problems, but it seems as though Prussia won't stop invading my mind and this story._

_Sudden need to do angst. And that's a miracle. I generally suck at it and can't take angst all that well. But, but I was suddenly thrust into my Korean phase (which is odd, since I haven't been in one since the glorious year of '07) and found an angsty fic concerning a certain duckbutt singer, and I saw angst and its beauty. I am inspired to do angst!_

_Oh, yes, thanks to all those Guest/Anon reviewers. I'd reply, but I am a seriously lazy bastard and tired. Expect PMs; those with accounts. And thanks to those who alert and fave, really.  
><em>

_I have now converted to Xiahnism. :D Oh my god sun, I miss Katamari Damacy._

-aktf:) always keep the food.


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